Whats Cookin At The Cooks "Come What May..And Love It!"

Thoughts on 2011

2012-01-04T09:30:00.005-07:00

Last year around New Years I had the thought/impression that 2011 would be a very good year. In my mind I was thinking that meant lots of vacations, so much money we wouldn't know what to do with it all, and just lots and lots of fun.

As it turns out none of that happened, expect for the fun. We only went on one vacation and that was a family reunion. We went to Cedar City to celebrate my Grandparents 70th wedding anniversary. We did not have loads and loads of money to do whatever we wanted whenever we wanted. It was a hard year in that department and one of this years resolutions is to try and not be so not smart with money. But as I look back at 2011 and think "why did I think it would be such a great year", I am able to count my many blessings.

This past year was a very special one for my little Mady. She turned 8. In The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints turning 8 means you are now accountable for your choices and you get to be baptized and recieve the Holy Ghost. Mady was so excited and ready. The spirit was strong and there was lots of love on that special day.

There are moments in life that you know you will always remember and cherish forever. For me this year that was "The Music Man". It was so much fun to be in this play with my Mady and to take a leap WAY out of my comfort zone. I met so many amazing people and made friendships that will last forever. It is awesome that a silly little play can bring so many wonderful things. I'm so grateful that I was able to do this and I am grateful that Ryan was a super trooper taking care of the other kids while we had this awesome experience.

In February I was able to do the hair for our local high schools production of "Les Miserables". It was a remarkable experience. My little sister Mallory and my little Mady were in the show. Mady played little Eponine. She just loves acting and being on the stage. It was so humbling to watch these kids grow and strengthen and watch their amazing talent. Normally when I help with a show I am soooo done with it by the end of the run but this one was different. It was life changing and I am grateful to have been apart of it.

In September we took Daxton in for his annual Heart Cath so the doctors could test his beautiful angel heart for rejection. We are humbled and grateful that there is no rejection and we are going strong 3 years post transplant.

Ryan and I celebrated our 12th wedding anniversary. Some years I feel like we deserve a medal for getting through the year together. Marriage is amazing and awesome but it is also dang hard and frustrating at times. So I am grateful for a man that I love more now than on the day we were married forever. He is my Eternal Boyfriend!

And last but most defiantly not least is my weight loss journey. This year has been one of "getting healthy". Ryan and I joined a gym that literally kicks our butts. It is hard work and emotionally taxing but it has been so worth it. I am down 30lbs with a lot more to go but I have seen that it takes hard work and that it really is all about what I put in my pie whole. So I am grateful that I feel better and have more energy.

So even with no cruises or trips to Disneyland, new house, sprinkler system, perfect yard, perfect house, perfect anything 2011 was a great year.

Happy New Year Everyone!!

So Beautiful!

2011-12-08T09:00:00.006-07:00

This is a beautiful message on life after death. I know that we will be able to return to our Heavenly Father and brother Jesus Christ after we leave this earth. I am so grateful that he died so that we could be reunited with the ones who have passed away before us. There is so much comfort and peace in having this knowledge.

Merry Christmas!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wy41VCbdt0I

Summer Fun!!

2011-10-17T09:54:00.005-06:00

Yes I do know that it is almost the end of October but alas that is how my life goes...always behind. Oh well, here are just a few of the fun things we did this summer.

For my birthday we went up to Mueller Park Canyon and had a wienie roast.

Nothing says "Happy Birthday" better than a cake fight!!

I LOVE food fights!!!

The best birthday present ever...my cute family!
Cooling off.....ahhhhhh.....

First day of School! Mady started 3rd grade and Ellie started Kindergarten.

Daxton seeing his sisters off to school.

Our annual trip to Lagoon. This is Madys reaction after riding the white roller coaster for the first time. She did not like it.

Ellie all smiles on the Carousel.

My sweet Grandfather and Grandmother have been working on their genealogy and life story for 50 years. We had a big celebration and luau and he revealed the book to the family. It was so exciting. It is a beautiful book of our history and it is an amazing gift they have given to me and my family. I'm so grateful.

Mady showing off the picture of her in the book.

Mady and I had the awesome opportunity of being in our Stake production of "Music Man". We rehearsed all summer and performed the last week before school started. Mady was a towns girl and I played the part of Ethel Toffelmier. We had way too much fun and met many many amazing people. It was sooo much fun.

For ALL Women

2011-09-27T11:26:00.003-06:00

This past Saturday I had the privilege to hear an amazing man give some amazing counsel and I thought that I would share it here.

http://lds.org/study/prophets-speak-today/unto-all-the-world/president-uchtdorf-reminds-sisters-of-five-things-to-forget-not?lang=eng.

We as woman with the help of the adversary are too hard on ourselves. All we can do is our best and then let the Lord take over. I have tried to make a new resolve to enjoy this day and enjoy the "small moments".

I just wanted to share this and hope that it helps lighten your load.

I LOVE SUMMER!!!

2011-07-01T13:51:00.006-06:00

I just love love summer! This has been a very relaxing, no stress summer. All my kids sleep through the night and occasionally sleep in, which is so nice. The girls are taking summer ballet and we will be taking swimming lessons in August. But besides those two things we have no commitments.

My mother-in-law bought a cricket for the girls and Mady has been loving scrap booking. She finally learned how to ride a bike a few weeks ago and is in love. She wants to ride every where we go. She was sooo scared to learn how to ride. She kept putting it off and finally one day my mom took her up to her church parking lot and she picked it right up. I am so proud of her. It is so wonderful to see her accomplish something that she didn't think possible.

Ellie has a best neighbor friend named Lily who is at our house more than not. They are two peas in a pod, they have the same personalities and share the same exact birthday. It is fun to have them playing(most of the time.) Ellie is so excited for kindergarten and tells everyone that will listen.

Daxton is growing fast. He just graduated to a big boy bed. The first night was very rough and made me nervous but since then he has slept through the night. I love having him wake me up in the morning. He turned 3 in May. We had a fun celebration with the family and then we took him to see Thomas the Train. He had a lot of fun. Medically he is doing great. We had clinic two weeks ago and everything looks wonderful. We had an appointment yesterday at the "Fun" clinic. It is a clinic for eating issues. We met with with a Nutritionist, Pediatrician that is expert in stomach stuff, and a social worker. It was very nice to talk to someone who understands how frustrating it is with Daxtons eating issues. He is still throwing up and can't tolerate more the 6 oz. of fluid. They put us on two stomach meds, changed his formula and we are going to a feeding therapist. I pray we will have progress with that this year.

As for Ryan and I we have turned a new page in our lives. We both were so tired of being over weight and inactive so we started going to a local workout center called GPP Fitness. I have been going for 2 months and have lost 23 pounds and lots of inches. Ryan has been going for a month and lost 6 pounds and is slimming down and getting stronger. It is amazing how much better we feel. We are wanting to teach our children to be healthy so we are changing a lot of aspects in our lives and it feels great!! But we still have a long way to go.

Thanks for checking in on us.

Question

2011-05-19T23:05:00.001-06:00

Does anyone blog anymore? Is facebook taking the place of blogging? I'm just curious.

I should be sleeping but....

2011-03-21T23:44:00.003-06:00

So my little man has learned a very not fun trick. He has learned how to projectile vomit on demand. He has always been very talented in the vomiting department but this is something new. He does it when he does not want to do something and that something is go to bed. Little Stinker, or should I say Big Stinker!!

We had his most recent cardiology appointment two weeks ago and everything is looking good, which we are very excited about. His white cells were elevated so we are having to do a few extra blood draws until that gets under control. After his appointment we got a call from out fabulous transplant team telling us that he is not growing-failing to thrive-I hate that expression, it makes me feel so inadequate, like I'm failing my child.
Anyway, we are an appointment with the "FUN" clinic. Which I am assuming they will tell us what we can do differently. We are tubing him every 2 1/2 hours he is starting to get a little bit of an appetite, which is good but they want me to work on getting him to eat real food but how am I supposed to do that and get weight on him and have him not throw everything up. It is such a fine line. I know that in a few years we will look back and say "wow, I'm glad that stage is over." But for now this is where we are and we will continue to work on it. With Daxton it has always been in his control, he will do it when he wants to and we will just have to be patient. Thus is the story of my life.
Besides the eating dilemma things are going great. He is a typical 2 year old who is into everything, he is Mr. Destructo. He enters a room and has to make sure everything is on the floor where he thinks it belongs. He LOVES to play with water. He could play "potions" for hours. I just let the kitchen sink trickle a little and he fills cups up and pours them into other cups. He loves it.

Well thanks for checking in on us. The rest of us are doing well, just plugging along and trying to do the best we know how to do.

Les Miserables

2011-02-01T10:46:00.003-07:00

It is that time of year again when our lives our overtaken with drama, some good some bad. The production this year is Les Miserables. It is phenomenal! Madylin is playing the part of little Eponine and a few other little things here and there. I have been working on hair and wigs. This show is a costume and wig nightmare. The kids have been so much fun to work with. We have a hard working group of kids that feel so passionately about this production. The show is opening this Thursday Feb 3 and continues to run on the 4th, 5th at 2pm and 7pm, 7th, 10th, 11th, 12th at 2pm and 7pm and the final show on Feb 14th.
Woods Cross High School, Utah
For tickets- 801-402-4611
Please come and support these kids. I promise you will not regret it!

So So Grateful!!

2010-11-21T23:01:00.005-07:00

It has been too long since I have posted. This past month I have been contemplating my life and the things that I have been blessed with. My blessings are too many to count and I am so so grateful for all of them.

I'm grateful for little Miss Mady. She is FULL of drama and keeps me on my toes all the time. She is such a tender soul and I'm so grateful she is my daughter.

I'm grateful that Daxton is Two!! I'm grateful for a different perspective into the terrible twos. He is really really really good at being two but it is nice to be able to laugh and know that they wont last but I am grateful that he is two .

I'm grateful that Daxton has finally hit the growth chart. He is just barely touching the 1% but he is there. Finally!!

I'm so grateful that I can teach my children the Gospel of Jesus Christ and that I can show them that he loves them and cares for them and that he has given us a way to be together FOREVER with our families.

I'm so grateful for my Ellie. She is oozing with personality. She is so spunky. She is such a fun free spirit, I am so grateful I get to be with her every day.

I am so grateful for Ice cream. I have had strep this week and it tastes so so so good. And I don't have any guilt over eating 2 gallons of ice cream by myself. YUMMY!!
I'm grateful for my cute family and letting me dress us up as a theme for Halloween. If you can't tell Ryan is Jasper. He is a good sport.

I am grateful that the UTES won yesterday. I was beginning to question my team. Alas they came around and played a great fun game. GO UTES!!! I'll be more grateful if we can win BYU, which we can.

I'm grateful for our 2 very cute, very adorable kittens. Ellie got a kitty for her birthday and the next day we had to go back and get her sister. Boo and Pumpkin. And the best part is I'm not allergic.

And last but not least I am soooooooooo grateful that we do NOT own a dog anymore. Sorry Xander.

And the verdict is.....

2010-09-09T20:48:00.003-06:00

No Rejection!!! The biopsy went very smoothly they were done in only an hour and a half. I was hunkered down with my Rolos and Dr. Pepper when we got the page. Dr. Cowley said that everything looked beautiful, even his coronary arteries....Love it!! Daxton had a hard time coming off of the anesthesia he didn't want me to look at him, sing to him or even talk. If I did he would immediately start screaming and then his oxygen would go down in the 60's which made the nurse nervous. Poor guy. We took him on his first ever wagon ride in the hospital which he liked for a little bit but soon became irritated at that also. Once we got home he was all better. There really is no place like home. We received the call tonight saying that there was no rejection and that the results were "perfect", that is what I like to hear. We feel so blessed tonight and are feeling very humbled by the miracles that we have witnessed. Our thoughts have been with our donor family, we are eternally grateful for their selfless act of service that they gave to our son. My heart aches for them this night. To them I say Thank you with all my heart for giving my son a chance at life. We love you and pray for your peace and joy.

Two options

2010-09-05T22:23:00.003-06:00

Tomorrow is the day. It will be 2 years minus one day since Daxton recieved his beautiful angel heart and he is having his fifth biopsy tomorrow morning at 6 am. After being rescheduled last week it has given me some time to ponder on a few things. I had been super stressed and worried about this biopsy and was very overwhelmed. Last week at church during testimony meeting a women stood up and said that we have two options in life, we can live by fear or by faith. This hit me like a ton of bricks. I realized that I was letting fear take over my life and I was not liking the outcome of that decision. So this week I have been looking toward this biopsy with faith. I have remembered where we have been and how far we have come with faith as our guide. One of my favorite scriptures is; "For mine is not the spirit of fear, but of Power and of Love and of a sound mind." This scripture has been a comfort to me in many aspects of my life and has helped me this past week. I am so so grateful for this new perspective and know that tomorrow will be just fine no matter the outcome. We have amazing doctors and nurses looking after our little man and more importantly our Heavenly Father and Savior. Thanks for the prayers, please say a few more for Daxton tomorrow.

Postponed.....

2010-09-03T10:41:00.004-06:00

We got a call yesterday letting us know that Daxton has been bumped until next Thursday, the 9th. We'll keep you posted.

The day before Daxton's two year biopsy

2010-09-02T07:14:00.003-06:00

Tomorrow we will head up to Primary Childrens Hospital for Daxton to have his 5th heart biopsy. We are coming up on his 2 year transplant anniversary on Sept 10th. It has been a year since his last biopsy and I have been a nervous wreck this week. We have not been to clinic for two months, which is good but it makes me nervous to have not seen his beautiful angel heart for while. So we will go with high hopes for a fabulous "0", for NO rejection. Please say a little prayer for him tonight.

Boston

2010-08-14T21:14:00.007-06:00

I had the amazing opportunity to go to Boston with my Grandpa, Mom, Sister, Aunt and cousins. We stayed with my Aunt Marjie and her family who lives in Boston. It was fabulous vacation and a trip for a lot of firsts.

What is a trip to Time Square without a picture with SpongeBob?

The Statue of Liberty was fabulous. I loved every bit of it.
(Does that shirt scream tourist or what?)

My first taxi ride. We arrived at our hotel at 11:30 pm to find out that they had booked us two rooms with 1 King size bed in each. That would have been fine if we didn't have 9 people! So they found us a close by hotel that would accommodate us, thus the taxi ride. I was really dissapointed that it wasn't a yellow cab but I think we had a memorable experience when the driver decided to back up on the freeway instead of wait through traffic.

My favorite part of the trip to New York was seeing the Broadway musical "Wicked". It was so spectacular and the talent was unbelievable. I Loved It!!!

After our fast and furious trip to New York we were now able to enjoy the beauty and historical richness of Boston. It is such an amazing city with such rich historical background. I really did love everything about it. This picture of me strangling the duck is at Boston Commons where the story "Make way for the ducklings" was written about.

This is me and my beautiful sister at Revere Beach.

This was one of my favorite places that we went. Walden Pond. It was so peaceful and serene. I could definitely see how someone could be a recluse there like my new boyfriend was.

Me and my boyfriend Henry David Thoreau. Ahhhh so romantic.

Harvard.

I was trying to look intellectual on the campus of Harvard but I think I look more confused than anything else. It really is a gorgeous campus.

This is my family at the Sleepy Hollow cemetery. I found out half way through our tour that it isn't "the" Sleepy Hollow from the story that one is in New York. After that it lost some of its eerieness but it was still cool to see authors headstones, like Louisa May Alcott, and Emerson, Hawthorne, and Thoreau. It was super cool. It was in my favorite town in Boston; Concord. It was so cute and quaint. I loved it.

The Boston Temple.....Gorgeous!!

I love lighthouses. This was in Cape Cod. Oh how beautiful the Cape is. The water was FREEZING, but we got in anyway. We drove out to Province the city farthest on the Cape, that was quite the experience. It was all so beautiful.
We were going going all the time. We fit everything in that we wanted to do and see. I loved it all and am excited to someday go again and take Ryan and maybe the kids.

Surgery

2010-07-11T22:31:00.002-06:00

Daxtons surgeries went really well. It was unbelievable how fast it was. Ryan and I went down to our favorite place to eat in Salt Lake, the Rainbow Cafe, and got breakfast went back up to the waiting room and he was done. The first 24 hours were really rough for him. He was in A LOT of pain and pretty much cried all day long even with the Lortab that was prescribed. But the next morning he woke up happy. It still hurts him when he pees, he cries a little but he is healing really nicely. The ear tubes went so smoothly and honestly I don't think he even knows anything happened to his ears. Ryan and I have the guilt for putting him through a painful procedure but we hope that it will benefit him in the future. Through this whole adventure my four year old Ellie has learned a new vocabulary word-the "p" word for the male genitalia. It is what it is. Now whenever someone asks how Daxton is she immediatly says that is "p" hurts, but she says the whole word. It is quite embarrassing. Kids, you just got to love them!!
So now no more procedures until his 2 year post transplant cath in Sept. Yahoo!

Tomorrow

2010-07-06T23:25:00.002-06:00

Daxton goes in for surgery tomorrow for his ear tubes and circumcision. We head up to the hospital at 6 am. I know that it is necessary but I hate to put him through all of this especially when he is so happy and content with life. I'm not complaining just sad that tomorrow he will not be a happy camper. Send some prayers our way and also to all the heart babies going in for heart surgery. We are thinking of you Mckay...Good luck buddy.

Question for the mommas

2010-06-03T19:53:00.002-06:00

We have decided that it is time for Daxton to get tubes in his ears. He has had multiple ear infection and constantly has fluid behind his ears. So the little man is having surgery. I know that it is very minor and that he should be done in 15 minutes. I am not too worried about it besides the fact he will have discomfort.

While he is getting tubes in his ears we are having him circumcised which turns out is a more intense procedure than the tubes. He will have to be completely put under and it will take longer than the tubes. I am sad to put him through this but at the same time feel like it is something that will help him in the long run. I know that uncircumcised males have a higher chance of infection and that worries me because of his transplant.

So my question is if anyone has any more useful information. As of now we are a go I have tried to call the transplant team to see what their opinion is from a cardiac stand point. I have not heard from them yet(very frustrated with the new mode of trying to get a hold of them, but that is another subject) What do you think?

Absolutly Amazing!!

2010-05-26T22:55:00.004-06:00

This is an incredible story that I wanted to share. I was privileged to meet this miracle man and his sweet little mommy the other day. I just love science and the giant leaps that it is making. Enjoy......
http://www.ksl.com/index.php?nid=148&sid=10921916

Two years old!!!

2010-05-23T22:19:00.006-06:00

A big huge Happy Birthday to my baby boy!!!

Two years ago right now I was in labor with my little man. It was a long emotional labor(36 hours). We had just found out three days before that our son had a heart condition. The word "roller coaster" is a great way to describe our emotions. We were determined to look on the bright side of things and to put our faith in trust in our Father in Heaven who knows all and who had ours and Daxtons best interest in mind.

He came out fighting. When we decided to name him Daxton we looked up the meaning of his name and there was none documented. Since the beginning he has fought many battles and has risen above them, thus the meaning of his name is "Warrior". Ryan gave him the nickname Daxtonius Parkerius. He has and still is living up to his name. He is starting to get a wonderful little temper. When he doesn't want something that I am trying to give him he hits his head with both his hands. I wonder what he is trying to accomplish?

In his two short little years Daxton has:

-survived a heart cath at 3 days old
-survived a heart surgery at 5 days old
-survived 2 1/2 months on a ventilator
-had his first smile while on the ventilator
-survived a heart transplant on Sept. 10 2008 at three months old.
-lived through a g-tube placement surgery-because he was not gaining weight and is still struggling gaining weight.
-has endured innumerable blood draws, pokes, probes, etc.
-has lived through 3 additional heart caths and will need one once a year for his entire life.
-he struggled crawling, walking, eating but now is doing all of these like a champ....well the eating we could work on a lot more.
-enduring life at home with two very loving and protective sisters and always with a Smile!!!

Daxton loves his:
-Sisters
-Mom and Dad
-Dog,Xander(honestly the only reason I have kept the dog is because of how much Dax loves him)
-choo choo train, especially Thomas
-watching "How to train your Dragon" and "Thomas"
-playing outside
-legos
-toy cars
-and we found out today he loves swimming

I love this little man! I am so eternally grateful that he is a part of our little family and I am his mother!!

His birthday present from the cardiology team is to let him go from three times a day meds to twice a day!!!!! To those who know this is HUGE for us!! Since his transplant we have been giving meds at 8am 4pm and 12am. It is so nice to not have to give that late night dose. I am a happy camper!!

So thanks to our Donor family and our Savior my little Dax man celebrates two years of wonderful, glorious, amazing life!!!!

I love you little man!!! Happy Happy Birthday!!!

Catching up

2010-05-11T16:17:00.006-06:00

I have not posted for a while and I thought I would just update with whats been going on. The girls have been keeping busy with the dinner theatre. They did a dance to Itsy Bitsy Bikini with their cousins Kiara and Kayli. They all had a lot of fun dancing and interacting with the high school kids. Last night was closing night and I am so glad that it is over.

We are rounding down the school year with lots of activities; dance programs, school tests, school programs, etc. May is always such a busy month.

My Dax man is growing so fast. He is a professional walker now and is getting faster and more independent. He has been eating really really well up until a few days ago. He seems to have a little bug and doesn't want to eat. It is times like these that I am exceptionally grateful for the g-tube. For easter he got a Thomas choo choo train which he absolutely loves. He loves anything boy; cars, trucks, dragons, and banging things. (Even his head when he is having a terrible two temper tantrum) But he still stays in touch with his feminine side by playing with his sisters and their barbies. We took Daxton to the full 3 hours of church last week for mothers day. He wasn't to sure about it, it was very exhausting but wonderful to have him there. He is so wonderful. I am so incredibly grateful that he is with us and we can watch him grow and develop, Thanks to our donor family and the Lord

Ryan started school again and hopefully will continue until the finish line. He is so close we just need to keep our eye on the prize. I am training for the Wasatch Back Relay right now and that is all consuming. I wonder if there will ever be a time when i can just go exercising without stressing about it all day. Probably not, but I do really enjoy running when I am finished with my run.

We are excited for the rain to stop and the sun to come out so we can come out and play and plant my garden.

p.s. I just added some random pictures that have nothing to do with the post, just for fun.

Running fool

2010-04-21T21:53:00.002-06:00

I have registered to participate in the Wasatch Back Relay. What I was thinking I am not sure. Alas, I am on the training road. I have a few questions for all you runners out there.

1-What do you eat before you run?

2-What is your favorite music to listen to on a run?

3- When I get about mile 2.5 the balls of my feet start going numb. I have tried to loosening my shoes, that didn't work. So do you have any suggestions.

4- And last but not least, how the heck am I going to run 6.9 miles at one time?

Prayers for Mason

2010-04-17T23:16:00.004-06:00

Sweet little Mason received his beautiful angel heart on Easter Sunday. What a wonderful and glorious gift to receive on such a beautiful sacred day. He is having a bump in the road right now. His little body is rejecting this new gift. The transplant team says that this can happen and it is more likely to than not. They can treat them with some heavy doses of anti rejection medicine. This is always a fear with us and we feel such relief after our monthly echos show no sign of rejection for our little Daxton. I ask that you spare a moment and send Mason and his family your prayers and faith. They have been through so much already and we have been a witness of Gods wonders. We are praying for continued miracles for miracle Mason.

Part two and pictures

2010-03-29T08:49:00.005-06:00

Day two at Disneyland started out wonderful the weather was perfect the lines were not too long. After the first night at Disneyland I got a little stomach bug and was throwing up all night. So about 3 pm Ellie started acting really sick and just not feeling well, she didn't even want to get her picture taken with Mr and Mrs Incredible. We were waiting in the line for the new toy story ride in California adventure we were literally getting in the car for the ride when Ellie puked all over me and her. YUCK! Just moments before I had zipped my jacket all the way up so all I had to do was take my jacket off and I had brought an extra set of clothes for Ellie but only Ellie(weird). So we cleaned up nicely.

We ended the night with a wonderful ride of Pirates of the Caribbean(I love that ride) We parked our stroller nicely next to the hundreds of other strollers, and after the ride came back to retrieve it and was gone, no where to be found. We reported our stroller missing Mady and I walked with the security guard to the Lost and Found and she helped us file a report. Items that were missing; stroller, two backpacks, camera, Mady had purchased with here birthday money a new drawing book, the girls autograph books, and a bag full of pukey disgusting clothes with throw up all over them. They security guard told us that strollers usually show up with in 24 hours, normally people just think that it was theirs and then realize it isn't and just leave it. That was our hope, alas it was not to be. They never retrieved our stroller or any of the other items.

On the final day at Disneyland we were still in the hope that our stroller would be found so Mady and I ran ahead of everyone to check lost and found and rent a stroller if we needed to. Lost and found had not seen our stroller yet so frustrated we went to rent us two strollers, I was so frustrated and asked them since our stroller was stolen at their park if they would discount, give us a buy one get one free, anything. Nope, nothing so I pulled out the card to purchase the strollers and the lady told me she couldn't take the card because it had my husbands name on it, ahhhh. I showed her his ID, still no. I was so frustrated through tears of frustration I told her what had happened and that all I wanted to do was rent a dang stroller(and I didn't use any profanity's). She turned around and went and got her manager. Ryan got there just in time and we rented two strollers.

I decided I was not going to let that ruin our last day at the happiest place on earth and I didn't. We had a wonderful time. The weather was picture perfect, there were no lines. We walked up to every ride. It was wonderful. The kids got to meet all their favorite princesses. That was Daxtons favorite part He would run up to the pretty ladies with a big smile on his face and sit on their laps. He is such a ladies man.

I love Disneyland and it was so fun to be there with my parents, sister and my brothers family. And what would a vacation be without some adventures?

Good times and big adventures...Part One

2010-03-12T19:54:00.005-07:00

Last week we were able to take a family vacation to the hap hap happiest place on earth...Disneyland!!! We had a lot of wild adventures and a lot of good times. It took us two days to drive there with a 2 am stop in Primm, Nevada. The highlight of Primm was the very overpriced over cooked buffet and the $10 gift shop.

Mady turned seven years old on Saturday and we were planning on going to the beach. While Ryan, my mom and the kids were shopping for some last minute items my dad was in the hotel room watching the news. The Earthquake in Chili just happened and there was a tsunami warning along the California coast. My Dad would not let any of us get near the Ocean so we decided to go to Disneyland. We were a little concerned because it was A. Saturday and B. overcast and the weather forcast was rain. But how fun would it to spend your birthday in Disneyland. We ultimately had a great day. Mady got a pin that said "It's my birthday" so all the cast members said Happy Birthday to her. At first she didn't like it but by the end of the night she just said "Thank you" and smiled. We did get rained on and poor Mady's feet were soaked. During dinner Daxton decided to throw up all over himself. Poor guy. So I walked back to our hotel room and changed Daxton and got a change of clothes for Mady and headed back to the happiness. By the time I made it back to the hotel room my pant legs were wet up to my knees. It felt good to get a change of clothes. Dax and I made it back to enjoy a few more rides. Ryan and I took Mady on her first ride of space mountain. She was not so impressed. Ryan kept yelling "faster, faster" so Mady thought that it was his fault the ride was going so fast.

The girls were disappointed that the tea cup ride was closed but there favorite rides were Dumbo and the roller coaster in toon town. Mady's favorite part or the day was getting Minnie Mouse's signature. Minnie wrote in Mady's book "Happy Birthday Mady, Love Minne Mouse" Madylin was excited. We ended Mady's magical day with a ride on Peter Pan. I love that ride and Daxton loved it also. Good times!

Sorry there are no pictures, maybe with Part two....

Happy!

2010-02-22T23:02:00.003-07:00

We are enjoying life without the musical. Closing night was last Tuesday night. We had a lot of fun, but we are so glad that it is over. We love getting to bed at a decent hour, I love not having to curl hair for 4 hours out of my day, and I love being able to cook dinner and not eating take out.

Daxton is a walking champion! It is one of the most joyous things I have ever witnessed. I love when he comes waddling around a corner and has the biggest smile on his face. I love it. He is now mostly walking and only results to scooting when absolutely necessary. It is so fun to watch.

My little brother Zach and his family rented a house in Long Beach, California so we decided to pick up and go to Disneyland. We are so excited! We leave this weekend. I absolutely love Disneyland! The first time we took Mady when she was 2 1/2 years old and I was pregnant with Elizabeth. Ryan likes to make fun of me because when we were walking in the entrance there was Disney music playing and Mady was so excited, I was excited and I started to cry. It was pretty funny but wonderful. Hopefully I will be able to keep my emotions in check. We are pretty excited!

"For our Good"

2010-02-14T23:26:00.004-07:00

My heart is aching tonight for my dear dear friends. They had to say goodbye to their 4 day old baby yesterday. This has ripped at my heart. I can't seem to stop crying. I just want to hold my babies and never let them go. I hate to ask the question "why" and I won't, but trying to find comfort and understanding I was searching and found these quotes that speak truth to my soul.

"An understanding of Christ’s plan of redemption helps put it all into perspective. In our preexistent state our Father in Heaven presented His plan for mortality, which Alma described as the “plan of happiness” (Alma 42:8). I believe we all understood that by coming to earth, we would be exposed to all of the experiences of earth life, including the not-so-pleasant trials of pain, suffering, hopelessness, sin, and death. There would be opposition and adversity. And if that was all we knew about the plan, I doubt if any of us would have embraced it, rejoicing, “That’s what I have always wanted—pain, suffering, hopelessness, sin, and death.” But it all came into focus, and it became acceptable, even desirable, when an Elder Brother stepped forward and offered that He would go down and make it all right. Out of pain and suffering He would bring peace. Out of hopelessness He would bring hope. Out of transgression He would bring repentance and forgiveness. Out of death He would bring the resurrection of lives. And with that explanation and most generous offer, each and every one of us concluded, “I can do that. That is a risk worth taking.” And so we chose."

After all that I have experienced with Daxton and being a witness to many other heart friends journeys, experiencing the grief of losing a beloved Grandmother and Uncle and many more challenges that I have faced in my life, it does give me great comfort to know that there is a plan for me and all of us. We knew what we would face and we knew that it would be worth it. The sweet far outweighs the bitter. I don't know why my son was spared and others are not. All I know is that there are no words to express my gratitude that I am able to raise him here on this earth and that I am able to see his wonderful milestones. There is a plan and it is for our Good.

Please keep my friends in your prayers.

The rest of this article is very beautiful and worth the few minutes it take to read.
LDS.org - Liahona Article - For Thy Good

Daxton Walking

2010-02-08T17:35:00.002-07:00

This is actually Ryan. Wanting to post these vids I took of the Daxton walking. He's doing awesome!
Enjoy.....

And the Women were sobbin...........

2010-01-19T09:16:00.007-07:00

We are heavily involved with Woods Cross High Schools production of Seven Brides for Seven Brothers. My mother-in-law is the Director, my mom is the Technical Director and choreographer, both Mady and Ellie are in the play and I am the hair dresser for the show and will be running lights for the show.

This is one of my most favorite musicals so it has been a lot of fun. The girls just love it and are singing and dancing all day long.

The show runs from Jan 28-Feb 16th with matinees on Feb 6th and 13th. The show starts at 7pm and runs about 2 hours. Ticket prices are $5-$8. You can call the ticket office for tickets at 801-402-4611.

I promise you will not leave disappointed. The girls would love to see you there.

Goodbye ritual

2010-01-13T22:40:00.003-07:00

My sweet little Elizabeth has a ritual now that must be done in accordance when saying goodbye or we have a catastrophic meltdown. This is how it plays out.

Me-"Mommy has to run to the store I will be right back"
Ellie-"No, don't leave me"
Me-"I will be right back and if you don't cry I will bring you back a treat"
Ellie-"I want to come"
Me-"I will be right back"
(this is where the sobbing begins-when I say sobbing I mean Ellie sobbing)
Ellie"Mom(saying this while crying) I love you, don't leave me, hold me, Happy Holidays."
Me-"I love you too, I will see you in a minute"
Ellie-(still sobbing)"love you, Happy Holidays"
Me-"Happy Holidays"
Ellie-(starting to panic cry)"Mom, Mom, I love you Happy Holidays"
Me-(she is now grasping onto me)"Sweetie go get Daddy I will be right back, I love you"
Ellie-(still crying) "I love you, I want to come"
Daddy finally comes and takes her, I actually walk out the door and half way to my car.
Ellie-(running while sobbing) "Mom, I love you, Happy Holidays"
Me-"Ellie I love you too, Happy Holidays, go back inside"
Ellie-(watching mom drive away yells one more) "Happy Holidays"

It is very adorable, yet annoying. This goes on even if I am just going to get the mail. I am now starting to sneak out to avoid long drawn out over dramatized productions. This morning she put the piano bench in front of the door so Mady could not leave for school. She cracks me up. Love this girl, she defiantly makes my life exciting.

Public Display

2010-01-08T22:49:00.002-07:00

Today I went to lunch with Ellie and Daxton to one of my favorite sandwich shops. It was time to feed Daxton and as usual would not let a significant amount of food pass his cute little lips. So I pulled out the tube and began feeding him. I have never fed him through his button in a public restaurant before and was concerned by the onlookers. There was one lady who would not stop staring every time I looked over she was looking at us. It made me very uncomfortable. It was one of those moments when you feel like everyone is staring at you but you are probably just being paranoid. I was getting so frustrated because all Daxton wanted to do was stand up and make a mess and to add to the joys Ellie decided today would be a good day to be as loud as possible every second of the day. I just felt overwhelmed. It was very unsettling.

So my question to all you tube feeding Mommy's, what do you do when you feed your kids in public? What is the "etiquette" for such feedings? And also I am wondering if you a "normal" person who has not seen a tube feeding before would it gross you out to see it in public and if it does what could we do to not gross you out?

Daxtons last cardiology appointment was Thursday and he had gained a little bit of weight. We met with the nutritionist again and we set some different goals. I was hoping that we could pull him off of tube feeds but it is not looking like that will be in the cards for awhile. They did start him on a new medicine that helps make him have a stronger appetite. Hopefully this will help.

New Years Confessions

2010-01-05T09:43:00.003-07:00

Ok so last year sometime I blogged about my goal to run a half-marathon. I started to train I really did. I got up to about 4 miles and I thought to myself "what am I doing?" "I don't want to run 13ish miles" I realized how silly it was when I drove from my parents house to my bank then up to my Uncles house then back home and it was barely 3 miles. I thought that is pure insanity. So I stopped. I admire those that can get up at the bottom crack of dawn and run but I am not that person. I love love love my sleep. So that is my confession, Wow, I feel a whole lot better.

Having said all of that here is part 2 of my insanity quest.

My big brother has invited me to be part of the Wastach Back Relay Race. This race consists of 12 team members running from Logan to Park City. Does this sound a little bit suicidal to anyone else. I really did try to talk myself out of it the other day but my brother would have none of it. So the training begins. Does this sound fun? No. Will it be fun? Probably. But I probably won't admit that until the end. So wish me luck I will most defiantly need it. And I will not not not quit this, no matter if it kills me. And yes saying that sends shivers down my spine and gives me an instant stomach ache, but I will prevail!!

Big news at the Cook Home!

2010-01-04T09:36:00.000-07:00

Last night Daxton took his first steps!! Ya for you big boy!! Today he is determined to not let that happen again but we know that he knows how, so you can't pretend anymore little bud. That is a great way to start out 2010!! I will try and capture it on film, but no promises.

Funny things

2009-12-21T00:35:00.002-07:00

I love the cute little things my kids say. The other night I took the girls out to dinner before we went to my sisters choir concert. Mady was drinking a fruit punch, she looked at me and said "Mom fruit punch is really good for you because it has fruit in it." Right sweetheart.

Our little Ellie is giving us a run for our money lately, and her sister is not helping with that very much. The other night the girls were playing and Mady did something to make her sister sad. Ellie came crying into the kitchen, fell on the floor and while sobbing said "I have a broken (big wail)....a broken heart." She is so very dramatic.

I love my girls, I am just hoping that I can keep my Santa is not bringing presents threats to a minimum this week.

My little Dax

2009-12-15T12:40:00.006-07:00

It has been a while since I have given a Daxton update. He has progressed so much in just the last month it is incredible. He has just conquered the skill of standing up by himself. He loves to walk holding on the furniture, hands or using his walker. He is so incredibly proud of himself when he stands up. He looks at us and just laughs-it is like he is saying ha, I knew I could do it. It is so sweet.

He is still my little butt scooter, although the craziest thing happened. Thanksgiving night we were at my Grandpas house just sitting around talking when we looked down at Daxton and he was crawling on all fours with his head on the floor. It was so bizarre. It was like he always knew how to crawl. He must think his head is too heavy because holding his head up seems to be the biggest obstacle for him.

His eating is going really good(minus my emotional meltdowns). We have clinic on Thursday so I am praying so very hard that he has gained some weight. He is really liking shakes. Thanks to my sister-in-law Myca we use a magic bullet to make his shakes. We will put a thing of yogurt, banana, carnation instant breakfast, a couple scoops of duocal, whole milk and some carrots and he drinks it up. This past week he figured out how to drink from a straw so that is fun. It took him a while to realize that he has to swallow after he sucks it up. But he is getting the hang of it.

He is such a happy little man. He loves watching his sisters dance and play. Yesterday Mady was home sick with pink eye and literally for hours he just sat and watched the girls dance and he just would laugh and giggle at them. It was one of my favorite mom moments.
I am just thrilled at how far he has come. I wish I could go back a couple months and tell myself to relax, he will develop at his own pace. Yesterday I read a quote from an email that said

"Did you know that 90% of what we worry about happening never actually happens? Most of the time, however, the damage has already been done. The stress and anxiety has a devastating impact on us - physically and emotionally. How silly is that? We worry about things that will probably not happen to the point that it hurts us.

What are we afraid of? What is so scary about troubles in life? We have been given a guarantee that life will indeed have trials. But we have also been given a guarantee that God will never give us more than we can handle - in His strength. It is also during the troubles in our life that we grow and learn about God's perfect timing, love and faithfulness.

So why do we worry so much? You know what? I think we are not worried about the troubles at all. I think we are worried that God won't be there. Or that He will turn His back on us because of our mistakes, because of our sins.

If you knew for certain, absolutely, without a single doubt, that God loves you just as you are, has forgiven you for everything you have ever done and will ever do, and will never, ever, ever leave you, no matter what - would you be as afraid as you are now?"

That was just what I needed to hear yesterday. Thanks for checking up on us. I hope you all have a wonderful Christmas.

Next question

2009-12-10T09:33:00.002-07:00

Thank you so much for your help and advice. So far we are on day 4 of no tube and things are going well. He has stayed steady on his weight actually gaining 1 ounce-I'll take it. So here is my next question. What are some really fatty foods that kids(18 month olds) will eat. I tried sausage and eggs this morning and he would have nothing to do with it. He absolutely loves mac and cheese. And he loves yogurt. What are things that your kids like that are higher on the calorie list. I think I will start feeding him ice cream for every meal. He is still drinking Nutrin Jr which has a lot of calories and I tried to add Duocal with his chocolate milk, he didn't like that too much and I don't blame him I tried a taste and it was nasty. I thought Duocal was supposed to be tasteless. Any thoughts or info would be very much appreciated. Thanks so very much.

Questions about 18 month olds

2009-12-07T13:24:00.003-07:00

At Daxton's last cardiology appointment we discussed not feeding him through his g-tube during the day and see how he does. He has done relatively well. He had a little bug for a few days and was throwing up a couple times. Besides that the eating has gone well. We were still tube feeding throughout the night until the other morning I went in to get Dax up and he was wrapped up in his tube. It was all around his body and around his neck. Needless to say this has scared me to death. I haven't tube feed him at night since that happened. Overall he eats way better during the day with out the tube feeds at night. So now my questions and concerns are these.....

Heart moms-
Why are the cardiologists so concerned about weight gain with transplant babies? Does it have to do with their heart, does more weight make it function better? Or is it because he is not on the chart? He is on a steady curve upward but I honestly feel it will be a long time before we are caught up with the "normal".

All moms-
What is "normal" for an 18 month old? How often do you feed them and how much? We were just told by our pediatrician to take him off of the bottle so we are doing sippy cups now. How much do your kids drink? Are their diapers still full after a nights sleep? I know that Daxton is my third child and I should know all of this but I can't remember and honestly my girls were not great eaters.

I am going with my gut on this and I hope it is right. I am nervous for when he gets weighed in. Any help and advice would be so very much appreciated.

A New Heart For Miss Madison

2009-12-05T06:36:00.002-07:00

Another of Gods great miracles!! We are so happy for Madison and her family! Please pray for her and for their Donor family that has given the gift of life in the midst of their sorrow. There are no words to describe the gratitude I feel for our Donor Family. We are forever grateful for them and their selfless act of service. You can follow Madisons recovery and adventures with her twin brother at http://cooperandmadison.blogspot.com/

Another reminder

2009-11-28T09:05:00.003-07:00

Yesterday one of Gods sweet little angels returned home to be with him. Since becoming a heart mommy I have watched as other families have had to say goodbye for a time to their little angels. It is heartbreaking to me. I try not to ask "why?" I know that these little spirits were sent here for just a moment so that we could experience Heaven on earth. These are Celestial beings and are home and safe from the cares of this world. The passing of these little babies is a reminder to me of the precious blessing that is my son. I am so grateful for him and for the gift that he is to me and my family. I get very frustrated with myself that I need this reminder to enjoy life, every moment, but I still do need to be reminded. It is hard to try and find the balance of enjoying lifes moments and keeping life in order. So today I will choose to enjoy life while trying to keep it in order.

Thankful

2009-11-19T22:30:00.004-07:00

I'm thankful for my Husband, my beautiful children, My Savior, my church, my family, friends, my new home, Miracles. What are you Thankful for?

Random Things

2009-11-10T14:54:00.004-07:00

My wonderful Friend Natalie tagged me to write 10 random things about myself. Here goes it....

These are in no specific order of importance.

1. I love Football!!! Love everything about. I love watching it on TV, i love going to games. I love eating chick-fila at the Utes stadium(YUMMY)!! I look forward all week for Friday and Saturday night football.

2. I have a guilt complex. I feel guilty 97.5% of the time. I don't know how to stop it.

3. I miss my Grandma every day.

4. I love movies. Some of my favorites are "White Christmas", "Meet me in St. Louis" I love most Judy Garland movies. My guilty pleasure movie is "Bridget Jones Diary" I love Jane Austen type movies; "Jane Eyre", "Pride and Prejudice"(new and old),"North and South"
I love going to the movies. My favorite movie treat is Extra Extra Butter popcorn with milk duds. You put a bite of both of these in your mouth and it is like carmel popcorn, mmmm, yummy!!!

5. I have a thing for fresh crayons. I want to buy a pack every time I see one. They just make me happy. There is just something about coloring a picture with a brand new crayon. Love it!!

6. I love to bake. Not cook, Bake. One bowl, several measuring cups and spoons, one pan=magic. In college I would look up a new recipe each day and go home and make it. I loved making apple pies(even though I hate eating apple pies).

7. I will share this next one only if you promise the next time you see me you will not do any of the following. Deal. I have A LOT of pet peeves. The main ones can go under the category of mouth noises. Any and All mouth noises. Comping your food, chewing your gum loudly, cleaning out your teeth with your tongue, chewing gum at all, and last but most definitely not least clicking your tongue. That one tops the charts. When I was little my brothers knew that this bothered me and they would do it often just to upset me. Well one night when my parents were gone they were clicking their tongues at me. I got so upset that I dialed 911 and screamed in the phone and then hung up. Guess who showed up at our house moments later. Try explaining that to two police officers.

8-I have two hidey toes. Two of my toes hide behind the one next to them. When I was younger I thought that everyones toes looked like mine, until my dear friend Lara Lee made fun of them. It still doesn't bother me. One of the sweetest moments of my life is when my first baby was born and one of the first things we noticed was that she had toes just like mine. It was amazing!

9- I love to sing in the shower. Some of my favorites are of course Broadway tunes. "Memory" from Cats, "Les Miserables" "Seven Brides for Seven Brothers" I like to sing loud and it doesn't matter what it sounds like. I just imagine I am on stage and I have the best voice in the world.

10- I would love to have a soundtrack to my everyday doings. Everything would be more exciting set to music. Your first kiss, break ups, losing a job, your babies being born. Even the normal every day stuff; baths, meals, driving kids to school, discussions with your spouse, homework. Everything would be better set to music.

11- I'm cheating and adding another one. I love when people comment on my blog. :)

I now tag......Juliann, MaryAnn, Tara, Erin. Have fun.

Happy Birthday Ellie!!

2009-11-06T10:01:00.001-07:00

My cute little Ellie finally turned 4!! She has been talking about being four since she turned three. She is growing up so fast. I was going through all of her pictures the other day and I can't believe how these last four years have zoomed on by. She is so much fun. She is my little drama girl. She loves to dance and sing and make her little brother scream. It is her new found goal in life to make him mad. If he is sitting being happy she has a remedy for that. She is our little one liner girl. The other day we were all in the car and Ryan and I were having a discussion-ok more than a discussion we were a little upset. After a few minutes of listening to us "discuss" from the back seat of the car Ellie said "Oh shuuut uuup!" It was classic. That is a bad word in our house but it was much too funny to do anything but laugh. That is our Ellie, always keeping us on our toes with her wit.

We had a fabulous birthday. We invited Ellies friends and cousins to the pumpkin patch where the kids played in the maze and climbed on the tractors and got to pick out a pumpkin. Ellie had so much fun she did not want to leave. I love that her birthday is in the Halloween season. It is my favorite holiday, hopefully when she is older she will let me do a haunted house for her party.

The Birthday Girl!

The Party Gang. I don't think that is everyone that came to the pumpkin patch, kids kept jumping in and out of the picture.

Sisters, sisters, there were never such devoted sisters.

An impromptu bowling session while Ryan had to run to work for a minute.

Birthday girl and birthday cake. That cake took me 4+ hours to make and 5 minutes to destroy.

We love you Ellie belly. I am so glad I had you!!!

Cardiology clinic

2009-10-29T23:02:00.002-06:00

Today Daxton had his monthly cardiology clinic. We started out the day with labs. This is usually the hardest part of the visit, nobody likes to be stuck with a needle. Today was unusually awful. The lab tech first tried once with a no go so I had her call IV team, they came and attempted to get some blood from my brave little man. It took them 5 more tries to get barely enough blood to do all of the blood work that is necessary for all of the tests. Poor Daxton was screaming the entire time. He feel asleep for literally one minute during I think the 4th attempt just out of pure exhaustion. Most times I can handle the blood draws ok but today was awful for me to watch. Afterward I just wanted to sit and cry. We both made it and the rest of clinic went swimmingly. I love our transplant team they are all such amazing people. I feel like they are part of our family. All of his labs turned out great, his echo looks great. He has finally had some good weight gain. Last clinic he was 7.6 kilos and now he is 7.9!! So he weighs 17 lbs 6 oz!!! You get em tiger. He is just overall doing awesome.

I have wanted to update on all of Daxtons accomplishments lately. He is sitting up all by himself! The big great news for us is that he is eating like a champ. He will eat anything and will feed himself. He likes to eat on the go a lot so I will give him some cheese or some bread and he will just scoot around eating it. It is so exciting for us to see him eating well. It seems like right after I have a hard week worrying and stressing about his developement and growth he seems to just pick up the pace and get things done. It is like he is telling me to just chill out, he will get there.

I never ever forget where we have been with Daxton but somedays it hits me especially strong that he is a such a miracle. That him being here scooting on the ground, screaming at his sisters(also a new found talent as of late), learning to walk, and all of his fun little quirks, all of these are miracles! I am so so grateful for my little man. He is such a true joy. Our new goals are to get him to pull himself up to standing position and work on walking. You can do it Daxton! My girls are calling Daxton-Daxy. I am not quite sure about this new found nick name. What do you think?

No go.

2009-10-21T22:18:00.005-06:00

So we did not end up speaking on Sunday. Ryan caught the bug that has been running amuck at our house and my oldest darling was so sick. I also was fighting a sinus infection so we thought it best to stay home and not spread the love. We are all feeling great now. I finally feel like we are back in the land of the living.
Thank you all so much for your sharing your thoughts and experiances with me. I know that we will be talking soon so I will hopefully be talking on the same subject and get to share your stories with them. I just watched this video and I loved it. This is what helps me with my burdens.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=coef8G5ax6E
I also have some fantastic, exciting, miraculous news! Daxton can now sit up all by himself. I know I know it may not seem like a lot, however he is almost 18 months and has refused to sit up. But now he is doing it!! Yahoo! I am so proud of him. He gets pretty upset at me when I lay him down just so I can watch him sit back up. I love it! He amazes me! Sitting up-check-next step walking.

That their burdens may be light.

2009-10-14T17:52:00.004-06:00

So Ryan and I have been asked to give a talk at church on Sunday. This is the shortest amount of time we have been in a ward before we were asked to give a talk. We will try our best. I was hoping that all you lovely people could help me. If you would be able to share a story with me about someone/something has helped your burdens be lighter I would love your input. Thanks a bunch!!
Don't be shy.

One Year Transplant Anniversary!

2009-10-07T09:08:00.010-06:00

Daxtons one year transplant anniversary was on Sept 10, 2009. This has been an emotional post for me. There are so many emotions recalling last years event. The miracles that we have witnessed have been very humbling. We are so grateful for our Savior and his mercy and love.
We feel so blessed and we are excited to pay it forward.

We were not able to do a big celebration for Daxtons first birthday so I decided we could do a big celebration of life for his one year transplant anniversary. We had a wonderful time with friends, family, neighbors, and loved ones. We once again were overwhelmed by the love and support of all of those around us. Thank you for your continued support. We love you all so much!!

We went to visit Transplant team and say Thank you for all their amazing support!!

Getting a snoozer before the big party.

In memory of our Donor..We would not be here without your priceless gift.

Let the Party Begin!!

Dax and Nana Julie

Poppy Cook making balloon animals.

My daddy with his balloon creation!

We love you Nurse Peggy

Nana Julie and Nana Janet with the grandkids

Daxtons pediatrician the amazing Dr. Allred.

Our wonderful, amazing, fantastic, brilliant Transplant team.

Daxton hanging out with the beautiful Princess Aurora(Lauren)

My childhood girlfriends

Heart mommies and Heart babies

Wonderful supportive friends!

We love you!

Great Grandpa Tonge

Love my fam-damily

Kaidance and Daxton two miracle babies!!

We had a wonderful celebration. We are so grateful for the opportunity to celebrate
with our little man. We are so grateful for our donor. We pray for you and your healing and happiness. Thank you for your selfless gift. We love you.

Super Slacker

2009-10-04T23:44:00.003-06:00

I have so much I want to post about but for now I will just talk about what is going on right now. We are all sick. Daxton started us out a week and a half ago. Ellie has been super sick since last Thursday, Mady started getting sick yesterday and I woke up this morning with a sore throat. Hopefully it will skip Ryan and that Daxton won't get this bug again. Besides being sick we are doing good. We are settled in our new home and love it! I still can't believe that we have our own home. It is so fun.
I absolutely love love this time of year. This past week we went up Farmington canyon and had a weiny roast. It felt so good to be in the mountain surrounded by the beautiful fall colors. I love getting the Halloween decorations out, I love deciding what the kids are going to be for Halloween. Thankfully this year the costumes will be low maintanance. Daxton is going to be a dog so we are trying to teach him to bark. He does it everyone once in, he does a high pitch little yelp. It is cute. We still have a few weeks to work on it.
Hopefully the rain will stop for a little bit tomorrow so we can set up our graveyard in the front yard. If not we will rest a little bit. Isn't life grand!!

Serioulsy...

2009-09-18T22:16:00.004-06:00

I have so so much to post and I am so far behind. I will catch up another day. I am in the mood to vent. So here goes it.

If I could change one thing at this very moment about the world it would be people judging other people. Please don't judge me when I am walking out of costco with my lysol wipes, two cute outfits for Daxton, block of cheese, 3 hotdogs and 3 drinks all while trying to keep a three year old in toe. Please young gentlemen don't share your thoughts out loud that "I should get a cart." If I wanted a cart I would have gotten one, it just so turns out that I parked where carts were not able to go-hence the armful of stuff!

Please don't judge me when I am running(jogging slowly) Please don't yell at me "run Forrest run." My name is not Forrest it is Hilary! Yes I know my bottom is big-hence the running!

Lets just try and give people the benefit of the doubt. Don't we all just want to be loved and accepted? I will answer that for you-Yes, we do!

Thanks for the venting session......

GO UTES!!!!

The results are in......

2009-09-04T23:33:00.001-06:00

Today I was so super ornery and very snippy at my kids. Wondering what was wrong with me I came to the conclusion that I was very nervous for the results of the biopsy. I tried to call cardiology and no one answered. So I had to wait-I hate waiting. Around 6:45 Emily called from cardiology and told us the results-NO REJECTION!!!!! Yahoo!! I started crying and began to breath(that is when I realized how stressed I was) So his annual cath turned out to be a piece of cake. We celebrated tonight by going to a Bees game with our good friends. The kids had a lot of fun and at the end of the game we were able to run around the baseball diamond and get a gift certificate for a free kids meal at the spaghetti factory-bonus!
Now I can breath.....

Heart Cath

2009-09-04T08:57:00.002-06:00

Yesterday morning started out crazy getting the girls ready, Daxton ready and heading up to the hospital for his annual heart cath. We were late(shocker) so we had to have the IV team come and give him his IV so that we could get a prograf level(this is one of two rejection meds that he will be on his whole life). The IV team was amazing and got an IV on the first try. Hallelujah! We then waited and Daxton took a short little cat nap. Ryan and I walked him down to the cath lab and handed him over. The anestesiologist gave Daxton a little sedative through his IV before we handed him over, it was pretty hilarious he started looking loopy it was amazing how fast it affected him.
Ryan and I then went and got some delicious Rainbow Cafe food-oh how we missed the cafeteria food.
The cath took 3 hours. We went down to meet Dr. Cowley and he said that everything looks great! Great! I was so so nervous but everything looked great! We are still waiting on the biopsy results we will not know the results of those until some time today. We are hoping that they will show no signs of rejection.
After the cath we had to wait in post-op for 6 1/2 hours. YIKES!! It was long. The doctors orders were that he had to lay flat for 4 hours and some how it turned into 6+ hours. Oh well. Ryan and I got to spend a little alone time in our semi private room and Dax and I just snuggled. He is still tired today but seems to be happy to be home. I have pictures to post but I can't find my camera bag so I will have to do that later. Thanks for all the prayers and positive thoughts!! We appreciate them so much.

Crazy week

2009-09-02T00:17:00.002-06:00

Wow! Last monday was move in day and first day of school for Mady. I did not expect to be so emotional sending my baby to first grade but man that was hard. I tryed to hold it together until she went into her classroom. Sending her to kindergarten was a piece of cake compared to this. I do get a bad mom point for not knowing it was early out on the first day of school. Mady had to call me and tell me school was out, I was so embarresed. She came home from school telling me that it was the best day of her life so I think that things will be good.

The move to our first home has been a lot of fun. Everyday I love my house more and more. It has a lot of personality and fun characteristics. My mom got us the best house warming gift. It was a white swing for my front porch. It is perfect. Yesterday was a long filled day of painting. We got that done and now the fun part of hanging pictures and decorating begins.

Daxton news-Daxton had his 15 month check up yesterday. Everything looks great! He is still little of course (16lbs 9oz) but besides that he is doing awesome. He is now scooting everywhere. It is the cutest thing ever. He is starting to have stranger danger and seperation anxiety. I am a little worried about that because he has a heart cath on thursday. I hope that he doesn't scream and cry when they take him to the cath lab. We are praying for no rejection. If everything looks good with his heart and there is no rejection we will most likely be able stop giving him his 1 am dose of meds. I can't tell you how excited that makes me. Now maybe I won't be so cranky, uh actually not likely but I can pretend right?

It's official!

2009-08-22T00:01:00.002-06:00

The quote "We're really doing it Harry" keeps running through my mind. We signed the papers, well Ryan signed the papers on Thursday. It was very anti climatic. I was wanting fireworks, balloons, confetti, etc. We went, signed and then came home. We did pick up some chinese takeout, that was our celebratory feast. We are almost all done packing thanks to my mom and Natalie. I seriously would be lost without them. Thanks babes!

Daxton had clinic this past week. Everything went great. We were able to run into a lot of our most favorite people. We saw Toni and Orley from Rainbow kids, our favorite PICU secretary Annette and Amy and Hardy were there for Jacks sedated echo, we of course love to see all of the transplant team. We feel like it is a big party once a month. Well I feel that way, Daxton probably doesn't since he is the one getting poked and prodded. Everything with Daxtons ticker is looking great. He did however lose weight which I was expecting because he has been so sick for two weeks. We are finally back to where we were with his feeding pre virus so hopefully next check up he will have put some weight on. We were able to go down on some meds-yahoo! They tell me that if everything looks good with his cath in Sept then we will be able to stop doing his 1 am med. That would be amazing!

The movie quote was from 7 brides for 7 brothers. I love this musical! This is the musical that my mother-in-law and my mom will be putting on this year at Woods Cross High School. So come next February we will be having a hoe down! Yeeha!

Wish me luck this week with the move. It should be an adventure.

Twas the night before closing day.....

2009-08-18T21:13:00.002-06:00

Closing day is tomorrow! We are so excited and ready for our new adventure. Things have been crazy with the sickies but things are calming down. Daxton is feeling a little better. It turns out that he has hand, foot and mouth disease. Friday I was looking in his mouth and saw all of this little blisters. Poor little man. His gums are swollen and he does not like to take his magnesium. He is much happier during the daytime but at night he is struggling.
The cath lab called yesterday to schedule Daxtons next cath. It will be Sept 3rd. It really suprised me, I didn't expect for him to have one again so soon. But after this one we will be just once a year.

Life is good! We feel so very blessed to be where we are today! We are tired, overwhelmed, stressed, sick, disfunctional, but we are together and thats all that matters.

Movie quote of the week-"They say when you marry in June your a bride all your life."
hint-also a musical-one of my favorites.

Sick, sick and sicker....

2009-08-13T21:47:00.003-06:00

My sweet little man has been MISERABLE this past week. It started Sunday night with a fever then just aching, puking and moaning all the time. He kept pulling on his ears so I was sure it was an ear infection. Nope, he had a really red throat but it was not strep(that's good) He has about 7 teeth popping through which I am sure is just miserable. Poor little man. It has been 6 days and he still has a fever and is still pretty miserable. Today was the first day that he actually wanted to sit on the floor and scoot around. It just breaks my heart. Our transplant team said that it just takes longer for immune suppressed kids to get over colds and flus. I hope that we are turning the corner and he will get better soon.

Last night we had to make an emergency run to the hospital for my other big man(husband). He woke up with terrible chest pains and just not being able to breath. So being safe than sorry we ran him to ER at 12:30 am and had an ekg which was normal, x-ray that was normal, blood work normal-PHEW! But his lungs sounded awful. So they gave him a breathing treatment and some narcotics and sent us home. It was a bronchial spasm. Weird. He is using an inhaler now and is feeling better. With moving, a sick baby, invalid husband, stressed out momma, there is never a dull moment at our house. I know the dull moments are coming soon....

Bridger

2009-08-08T22:47:00.004-06:00

Today one of our dear sweet heart friend has finished his journey on this earth. Please send his family your thoughts and prayers at this most difficult time. This little man will always hold a special place in my heart.

Procrastination

2009-08-04T11:34:00.002-06:00

My girls are at a friends house, Daxton is sound asleep in his crib and I am so procrastinating doing the dishes and packing for our big move. We are hopefully closing on the house this week. Needless to say my house is a wreck. I just can't get the motivation to clean.

We have some good news at our house Daxton is finally mobile. He is a scooter. He is not crawling just scooting wherever he wants to go. It is really one of the cutest things ever. We are all very excited! This morning I was watching Barbie princess with Ellie, I looked over and Daxton had gotten into a cup of rootbear that had been left out. Awesome. We are excited at this new adventure.

The movie quote this week is from my alltime favorite movie. I watch it at least once month. So if you know me you will know what movie it is without the quote.
"Lets just say we are doing it for a pal in the army."

Clinic and Crawdads

2009-07-30T22:05:00.006-06:00

Today was Daxtons clinic visit. We haven't been to clinic for a whole month. I was a little nervous, that is the longest we have been between visits. Everything went well. His echo looked great. And all of his labs were good. So there was no reason to be nervous. I did however have a total embarrassing melt down with our Doctor and our Nurse. I am just super stressed, really worried about Daxtons development, buying a new house, the girls are driving me crazy(always fighting), my pink eye is driving me crazy, etc. It all just seemed to explode right at that moment. They were so nice and listened and gave me words of encouragement. I told them they could charge me for therapy time also. It always does feel good to cry. This picture is Daxton at clinic playing with his favorite toy. He did gain 1 pound. Seriously that was all one pound in one month. I think I had my expectations a little too high. But hey at least he is gaining. Here are some updated pictures of my little man.

When Daxton was in the hopsital we got a Life Flight t-shirt from one of our Life Flight friends This is him showing it off.

This boy loves books!

Sleeping with his alligator. One of my favorite things is watching my sleeping babys....so peaceful!

Tuesday night we went up to Strawberry resevoir with some friends to catch some crawdads. It was the coolest thing ever. You throw in a piece of chicken leg on a fishing string, wait for a few seconds, pull the string up and there are 3-4 crawdads biting the chicken leg. The boys caught about 20-30 of them then we took them over and boiled them-poor little things-and ate them. They honestly were not too bad, it is just like eating a mini lobster. It is the most bizarre thing I have ever seen. We had a lot of fun. It was so beautiful there. I love the mountains! It was a perfect evening. Thanks Topher and Ryan.

Daxton and Hazel waiting for Dinner....

Mady and Macy putting rocks in Ryans exhaust pipe, they are such good helpers. Don't they look so innocent?

Nutrious and Delicious, tastes just like chicken(not really)

Our Feast, it looks like a cornucopia.

Ryan and his girls sitting around the campfire roasting marshmellows and starbursts. YUMMY!

So comfy.....

I just wanted to show you all how attractive I have been looking. I know, I know try not to be jealous. I don't know who would ever say that they liked having pink eye? Seriously.

Who let the dogs out?

P.S. The movie quote answer was Lord of the Rings-Fellowship of the Ring. Good guessing

Pink eye, yucky

2009-07-28T00:13:00.003-06:00

I have had a terrible case of pink eye. I have been trying so hard not to give it to the kids. I finally broke down today and called in for a prescription. I am one to just let it run its course but I have had it. I was looking up home remedies for it. One was to put lemon juice in your eye, ouch! Another was to put breast milk in the eye, no thank you. I did try to put contact solution in the eye and that did not work. So I will now use the eyedrops.
So while I have been under the weather I have been on a movie kick. So the quote this week is from these movies(hint). The quote I wanted to give Ryan said was way to easy so here it is. "Many that live deserve death. Some that die deserve life. Do not be too eager to deal out death and judgement. Even the wise cannot see all ends"
Good luck

Saturday night and the moon is out.......

2009-07-25T23:56:00.005-06:00

My blog was defiantly in need of a face lift. So instead of preparing my Sunday School lesson for church tomorrow I will update my blog.
My sis-in-law is doing better. She is out of the ICU and now on the floor. She should be coming home sometime next week. It has been pretty nasty stuff. My little Mady was super sick for several days but is finally feeling better. So far no one else has gotten what she had. I did however wake us this morning with a little bit of pink eye-unclean-hopefully that doesn't transfer to my babies.
I officially started packing today. I started in the Attic where all of our storage is. It is so stinking hot up there I thought I was going to die, but I got that part out of the way. Our home inspection was last Thursday and everything went well. The house needs a new water heater and dish washer and the seller is taking care of that, so that's good news. We are so excited. We are going to be so house poor. I don't think we will be going on another cruise anytime soon. That is ok!
We have Daxton's cardiology appointment this Thursday. It has been a month and I am going crazy. The Transplant team is my comfort blanket. Daxton is doing great so I am not too concerned heart wise it is just nice to know everything is still ticking away the way it is supposed too. Daxton finally popped out his top tooth. He was very miserable for about a week. I was getting a little worried but after that white little mama showed herself life was good again.
Now I'm off to give Daxton's one am meds alittle early, shhh don't tell anyone.

p.s. Movie quote for monday was Dumb and Dumber. Seriously one of the best movies ever. That might be a stretch but it is pretty dang hilarious. "Samsonite....I was way off."

Swine Flu and Monday Movie Madness

2009-07-20T22:14:00.002-06:00

My sister-in-law is in the ICU at intermoutain medical center with the swine flu. She is in pretty bad shape. They can't get her oxygen sats up so they might have to put her on a ventilator. Her husband has it also. We were over there on Saturday and now Mady is not feeling good. I took her to the doctor and he put all of us on tamiflu just as a precaution. Please send some prayers her way. It is pretty scary stuff.

Movie quote "We're really doing it Harry!"
(this should be an easy one)

First time home owner!

2009-07-20T11:41:00.002-06:00

Well we are really doing it. Ryan and I are buying a new home. We are super excited! The home is in Bountiful so we will be still be close to family. There is still a lot to get done but we are hopeful everything will go smoothly. I was curious if anyone out there in the blogging world knows anything about first time home owner grants. I have been searching on the internet, its a little overwhelming. So if anyone has any information, advice I would love it.

No guesses?

2009-07-15T10:55:00.001-06:00

Well I guess you don't love this game as much as I do. The answer is First Wives Club with Goldie Hawn, Bette Midler, and someone else I can't remember. Love that movie! Me and my two best girlfriends in High School used to watch that movie all the time. Total chick movie.

Movie Madness Monday

2009-07-14T00:42:00.003-06:00

One of my favorite things to do is guess movie quotes! I love love love it. So I am going to start this new tradition. Guess this quote and be a winner. A winner of what you say? I don't know, just a winner. I am going to start out with a quote from one of my favorite movies.
"Bill, Lamborghini!!" "Ooh he's mad!"
I will tell you the answer later. Have fun guessing....

Need a good laugh?

2009-07-11T22:44:00.003-06:00

Watch this!!

Lets pull together

2009-07-09T19:10:00.004-06:00

Hello Everyone there is the sweetest little man that needs some prayers and lots of faith. He is Bridger and is currently in picu. His parents are working on getting him listed for a heart and lung transplant in California. I have a solid testimony that faith and prayers are both very powerful tools and they absolutely work. Please send lots of prayers their way. This little man just melts my heart. You can also head over to his blog and offer his mom and dad some encouraging words. http://www.bridger-smith.blogspot.com/

Hairdresser like mommy?

2009-07-02T13:10:00.004-06:00

This is what I walked into the other day........

Sweet Princess we might need to take a few classes before you cut anyone else hair.

She at least left the top layer so that we could camouflage it.

Next time mommy will hide her scissors

Its a race...

2009-06-30T22:16:00.006-06:00

Last Saturday was the Intermountain Healing Hearts picnic. When the picnic was held last year Daxton was in the NICU we were obviously scared to death about what the future would hold. It was nice to meet people who had been through this same nightmare. This year was a totally differant story. We had so much fun. All of us enjoyed the wonderful company, the slushes, the magic show and the heart shaped dessert contest. Last year on this day Daxton had his first heart attack. Reliving that night has brought back all of those unwanted feelings. I am grateful that we are on this side of things.My cake I made for the contest. We won four passes to the Bees game!! Yahoo! The other cakes were amazing next year I am going to have to learn how to do fondant.
Daxton and Jack-little heart buddies

Ellie and Morgan(Morgans sister is Gracie)
Mady with Brinley and Gators big sister
Daddy and Daxton sporting his scrunchy smile.

Ryan had to meet me up at the hospital for the picnic after work so we had two cars. Last summer Ryan and I would always race home(very responsibly) from the hospital. I mostly won(of course). So Saturday night the girls wanted to ride with Ryan so It was me and Dax. We were winning for a little bit but it soon became apparent that I would not be the winner of this race....unless.....I pulled out a few tricks. Suddenly my car wouldn't work anymore so I turned on my hazard lights and pulled over the side of the road, called Ryan and told him to come help me. While he was turning around to help me in my "desperate" time of need. I continued on home honking as I passed him. I of course won. There are no rules to this game and I came out the winner, which is not all that matters(unless Ryan is involved). Thanks for being a good sport Ry.

We are movin on up

2009-06-25T21:35:00.002-06:00

Today was clinic. It went very well. Daxton is growing and gaining weight. He is gaining the minimum amount of what they are wanting so we will have to keep working on that. His heart is looking great and everything else is going well. My favorite part of the visit was when we were talking to the doctor and "ulgh" Daxton puked. It was pretty funny. I had been telling them about his throw up and how it would just come and they got the privledge of witnessing it first hand. The exciting news is that now we have clinic only once of month!!! Yahoo!!! I am so excited. I do love all of the wonderful people on Transplant team especially Emily and Michelle. They are amazing and I love chatting with them. But we will have to catch up monthly now. I am so thrilled at how Daxton is thriving. Hopefully he will keep pluggin along.

Busy summer

2009-06-22T23:10:00.005-06:00

So far this summer is turning out to be a busy one. The girls are taking ballet, I am taking a cake decorating class(super fun), lots of play dates, family reunions, Lagoon, training for my half marathon and lots of other fun stuff. The marathon training is kicking my butt. Tonight I ran 3 1/2 miles. It is getting a little easier the more I do it which is nice. I have decided to run the Top of Utah half marathon it is on August 29th, the day after my birthday-thats a nice birthday present to me. I'm excited!

Me and the girls on the tilt-o-whirl.

My first cake.

Yay for Daxton he is finally standing!!

My family with Great Grandma and Grandpa Hilton

Cutest boy in the world hangin out at the family reunion

Last weekend we went to a friends house and their little son was playing with a basketball Daxton was so so excited so my little sister and I went on a quest for some balls. We found this big bag of balls at the DI for $4. After lots and lots of sanitizing Daxton was in heaven.

Random Thoughts...

2009-05-31T22:41:00.002-06:00

This weekend was the KSL telethon for Primary Childrens Hospital. Last year at this time our heart journey was just beginning. I remember watching it in picu while Daxton was recovering from his first surgery the BT Shunt. The story that had a huge impact on me was Paul Cardall. He and Daxton had the same heart condition-minus Daxtons coronary anomaly-I remember crying and thinking that if he had made it to age 35 there was hope for my son. I remember the feeling of overwhelming comfort. If there were ever moments that Paul wondered "Why? Why do I have to go through all of this?" One of the answers to that question is that Hilary needed to hear your story so that I could have hope and faith for me and my child. I thank my Heavenly Father and Savior for their love for me in knowing that I would need to hear Pauls story. Paul is currently on the Heart Transplant list waiting. We pray that his miracle day will be in the near future.

A few years ago I had started seeing a counciler for some issues from my childhood-the therapist told me at our first visit that the positive would far outweigh the negative in this experiance. I first I thought "um, ya right there is nothing positive in what I have been through." But as the years have passed I now know that he was absoulutly correct. I have learned some lifes lessons that have made me the person I am today. I can honestly say that I am thankful for what I have been taught. I have been thinking about that a lot lately and I feel the exact same way about this past year with everything we have had to go through. The positive has far outweighed the negative! My marriage is stronger, I have a deeper appreciation for living in the moment and to not take anything for granted. We have met so many spectacular people who we feel honored to know and be associated with. We have witnessed many mighty Miracles, our faith and testimony have grown. We have witnessed first hand the love and compassion our Heavenly Father and Savior have for each and everyone of his children. There are many many more lessons we have learned and many more to be learned.

On a side note-I have decided to train for a half marathon. I have not yet signed up for one but I will be starting my training tomorrow with a three mile run...wish me luck!

Happy Birthday Daxton!!

2009-05-29T10:47:00.004-06:00

My baby boy is One year old!!

We got home from our trip Sunday night at 10:30 p.m. Ryans mom made Daxton his blue elephant cake and had the house decorated for his birthday. We sang Happy Birthday and gave lots and lots of kisses.

The next day was memorial day so at the park we sang again and ate cake. Daxton was more interested in the plate than the actual cake. He shakes his head now when he doesn't want something and he was shaking it everytime I tried to give him a bite of his cake. I wanted to give him a really big birthday bash but transplant team said that we should wait until a year post transplant. So we will have a big celebration in September!

My sweet baby boy, You are our little miracle. Not a day goes by that I don't feel blessed to have you as my son. You have taught me things I never could have imagined. I love you with all of my heart! You are my little warrior, Daxtonious. Lets have this next year just be full of fun and good times.

Cruisin....

2009-05-26T19:32:00.005-06:00

St. Thomas was our first destination. Ryan and I got to go scuba diving, it was awesome. We had so much fun. It was so beautiful.

We went to Antigua the next day and relaxed on the beach all day long. The water was beautiful. This day I learned that Ryan is not a good bargainer. I love to bargain and could always get the seller down a little. Not Ryan they would tell him a price and I would try to bargain with them but Ryan would just say Hilary thats ok that sounds like a good price. It was funny. Cute guy!

Our third and final destination was Bermuda. Oh my was it beautiful. This was our favorite port. The homes were spectactular even the "slums" were beautiful. We went shopping and went sight seeing and then I had heard that the sand in Bermuda was pink so we went to the beach. Yes the sand was pink and soft and georgous. The water was so crystal clear. We would love to go back and spend a whole week just there however the average cost for a room there is $300 per night. That won't be happening anytime soon. It sure was beautiful.

This is our cruise ship

The last night we were walking around the ship and talking about how much fun we had, we commented on how we would have liked to see a dolphin and literally one minute later there were about 10 dolphins jumping out of the water right in front of us. It was so much fun. They were so cute.

We ended our trip in New York. I was so bummed that we couldn't stay and see anything but then we found out we would be docking right by the Statue of Liberty. We were up at 5:30 am so that we could see her. It was a very humbling moment for me. I pondered on all my ancestors and what the emotions they must have had when seeing this beautiful statue. I am so glad we got to see this.

We had a wonderful time and came home feeling refreshed and ready to go. We missed our kids but enjoyed the time as a couple.

*Funny story-on our flight to go to the cruise Bronco Mendanhall was on our flight. He is the head coach of BYU football. It was funny because I was wearing my Utah sweetshirt and Ryan his Utah hat. We were going to ask him to sign Ryans hat but we decided we didn't want to get it dirty-hehe

We're leavin on a jet plane....

2009-05-17T13:30:00.003-06:00

Here we go Ryan and I are off on our vacation. We are currently in Georgia waiting for our connecting flight. We are flying to Puerto Rico where we will start our cruise. Yahoo!! We are super excited and in much need of some R&R.

Busy Bees.....

2009-05-13T09:59:00.006-06:00

So far we have had a very busy fun month. Starting off with Dinner Theatre. It is such a fun
production put on by Woods Cross High. It is a collaboration of a lot of differant songs, and dance numbers. Mary O. and hubby were able to come and see it, we had a lot of fun.

My Dancing Queens....Mady, Ellie and my little sister Mallory. Their spring concert so cute!!

Daxton can now sit all by himself!! This is him and his girlfriend Hazel.

My favorite boys getting hair cuts.

The race for the cure! My mom is a survivor of Breast cancer. She has had it twice and went through a masectomy. She is a super trooper and has endured it so well. Every year we do the race it is a very humbling experiance.

We needed to get out and have some fun as a family so we went to the Lagoon Walkway. It was a nice hike/walk. I highly recommend it for a nice family outing. You walk behind Lagoon and can see some of the animals. It is very pretty well kept paved hike. We had a lot of fun.

Early Mothers Day present...

2009-05-04T00:05:00.003-06:00

This morning I asked Ryan if I could have an early mothers day gift. Being the wonderful, amazing, supportive, fantastic husband that he truly is he told me of course. I told him I would like a few hours of being home all by myself. So he packed up the kids and took them to his parents house for the evening. So tonight I picked up my book laid in my bed and read for 3 solid hours. HEAVEN!! And on top of that it was raining and thundering outside. Is there anything better than being curled up with a good book on a stormy afternoon? It felt so good, I feel like my engine is charged I can now handle the whining, screaming, fighting, meds, feedings, homework, breakfast, lunch, dinner, dance, recitals, cleaning, etc. much better now. I really have a wonderful husband. Thanks baba I love you....

Update.....

2009-05-01T22:19:00.002-06:00

So lots going on. I am still doing the boot camp thing. I had my measurements taken last week. I have lost 5 lbs and 13 1/2 inches. That made me really happy. My clothes are defianatly fitting better. I still have a long long long way to go to reach my final goal but I am now one step closer.

I took Daxton in to the Doctor last week, he ended up having a double ear infection. Poor little man and silly mommy, thinking it was teething. He is back to his happy go lucky self. He is progressing so fast. He is now putting pressure on his legs and sitting up all by himself. He still hates his tummy but will hold himself up alittle with his hands while on his tummy. I know these are all very minor milestones to most normal little babies but hey we are far from normal. I have been having a lot of uneasy feelings lately. It is almost a year since our nightmare began. I feel like somedays I am reliving every emotion that I have felt in the past year, and most of those are not fun emotions. It has been a hard year to process and maybe it will take a lifetime to process....Life is good, I am so incredibly grateful for the gifts we have been given and the support we have seen. Out of the bad always comes more good.

A Fun Post

2009-04-20T21:05:00.005-06:00

Seriously done with all the serious stuff so here are some pictures. On a side note Daxton has been sick this weekend. He has had a fever and super duper ornery, which is not like him at all. We think he might be teething but how do you ever really know until those babies pop out? So we will wait and see....now some pictures.

Yummy.......

While my sister was in town we got together and made and shot off paper rockets...it was fun and mine was the best...of course...

This is the girls at Grandmas house it was the last get together we had and we watched "Whats Up Doc?" If you have not seen this movie I highly recommend it. It is one of my top five favs.

Easter cuties!!

Pictures from my Grandmas funeral.

NO REJECTION!!!

2009-04-17T17:25:00.001-06:00

We got to the hospital at 6am got all checked in. Then they took my little boy to the cath. He went in at 7:30 and was done at 9:30. Pretty fast I thought. Dr. Day said that everything went well. They took 3 pieces of heart for biopsy. All of his pressures look great. The transplant team said that we probably would not know what the results were until tomorrow but to our happy surprise Michelle called and said that he is not rejecting his new heart. Phew!! What a relief!! Daxton did really well today, I am so proud of my little man.
We did however get a little pep talk on feeding him more. I have been just letting him drink what he will during the day but it is obviously not enough so we are uping his feeds. Thats ok, we just need to get him on the growth chart.
Thanks for the prayers, we feel truly blessed to be able to do the things we do with Daxton. We are so so so grateful for the donor family. They have blessed our lives in countless ways.

Heart Cath

2009-04-16T19:54:00.002-06:00

So my dad is doing really good. He is home, he came home yesterday. He is feeling a lot better. It is amazing what happens when your heart is working well.

Daxton is going in for his second heart cath since transplant. We have to be there at 6am-yikes. We are the first case so it should be fast. They will just look at the right side and take a few little pieces of his heart to test for rejection. I am praying for no rejection!! He is doing so well, lets keep it that way.

Seriously?

2009-04-14T21:54:00.002-06:00

So I got a call at 6 am this mornig-never a good sign-from my mom. My dad had been in the ER all night with heart problems. He went to LDS Hospital where they don't do caths anymore so he had to be transported by ambulance to the new IMC Hospital. He went in for a cath at 5:30pm and was finished at 8:30 pm. The procedure went well they were able to clear out all of the blockage and they had to put in a stint. My poor little daddy. He is so cute and was still able to joke with all of the nurses. He is doing well now, he will be in ICU overnight but hopefully be able to move to the floor tomorrow morning. Seriously?

My Grandmothers funeral was yesterday. It was a beautiful day and a beautiful service. She was an amazing woman. Her passing will leave a void in my life. But I will try to continue the legacy that she left all of us. ......

I'm tired......

Grandmas Obituary

2009-04-11T22:57:00.001-06:00

This is the link to my grandmas obituary.
http://www.legacy.com/Link.asp?I=LS000125999947X

Heaven....

2009-04-08T20:20:00.003-06:00

Last night my sweet, beautiful, amazing, gracious grandmother passed from this world into the next. Our hearts are heavy. We are mourning the loss of this beautiful daughter of God but with the peace and knowledge that God lives and that our Savior has felt every earthly pain we move forward. We feel blessed that she did not have to suffer any longer and I am eternally blessed to have her as my Grandmother. I feel honored to have known her on this earth and can't wait for the day I will see her again. My Grandfather invited us to attend the temple today, so we went to feel the spirit of peace. It was beautiful! I am grateful for the knowledge of the Gospel of Jesus Christ and his eternal plan, I know that she is in heaven and that I will see her again because of the Atonement of my and your Savior Jesus Christ.

Funny things

2009-04-06T22:08:00.004-06:00

I have been sick all weekend so I ended up not going to boot camp today. Hopefully missing one day won't put me too off of schedule. I am also super duper bummed that I wasn't able to go to Paul Cardall's benefit concert. I am sure that it was amazing and I am mad that I had to miss it. I hope that it was a raving success.

I wanted to share a few funny things my kids have said in the past little while....

-yesterday we had a water spill on our front room floor. I went to the closet and pulled out the sham-wows that I bought a few months ago and have never used. Mady looked at me and said "SHAM-WOW!!, that is awesome, those things really work!" Ryan and I looked at each other and thought how the heck has she heard of the sham-wow? Oh ya we remember, it was all those late night info-mercials she would watch instead of sleeping, little stinker.

-The other day we went to my grandmas house to visit it was dark when we were getting ready to leave, Mady and Ellie were walking out the door while I was saying goodbye to Grandma, we then heard Mady say "just keep going Ellie-NO matter what!" I wonder what she thought was out there?

-The other night after the priesthood session of conference Ryan came home and was helping put the girls to bed. He was telling the girls what he learned-one of his comments was that he learned how to be a better father-Mady responded"Finally" It was pretty dang hilarious. Ryan is an amazing father.

Kids are so silly! Love my girls!!!

Day 5!!! Yahoo!!!

2009-04-03T14:11:00.004-06:00

Holy Crow I can't believe i actually completed a whole week. I was trying to decide if I was even going to make it this morning but my downstairs neighbor helped motivate me and offered to watch my kids. I didn't go at 5 am I ended up going at 7am, which was way better. Today we were testing how fast we could run/fast walk a mile I did mine in 14 mins. That is alittle dissapointing but hey first week. Then we did the ladder how many steps we could do in a minute I got to 61 which again isn't that great but definatly room for improvement. Then we tested on pushups-I did 10-girl ones-so now i know and I can work on improving those results. I am really feeling good. I am not as tired as I normally am and my body is not nearly as sore as it was the first part of the week, so thats nice. Thanks super much for all your encouraging words, before I go to work out I look at the posts and they help me get motivated. Thanks

Did you know that April is National Donate Life Month!! This is obviously a very near and dear topic for us. Organ Donation saved my sons life and everyday we are so grateful for the amazing gift our heart family gave to us. I am so thankful to them for saying yes! So if you would click on this picture and you can register to donate life!! It really is a hard thing to think about but if you do it know and let your loved ones know your decision you could literally save lives. Thanks a million!!

Day 3 and 4 of Boot Camp

2009-04-02T21:25:00.003-06:00

So yesterday wasn't as bad as I thought-don't get me wrong it was super duper hard but once I started moving my legs they didn't hurt(it also might have helped that I took two ibuprofen before I went to work-but that's besides the point) Today was super hard we worked on abs and arms- I am just not a strong person but I will be(hopefully). Tomorrow is my last day with the 30 lb weight pack-Hallelujah! I have to go exercise tomorrow at 5 am, I am not a morning person and have never claimed to be so hopefully I get there....

Day 2 and Goodbye Mustache March!

2009-03-31T21:49:00.003-06:00

So today went really well with the boot camp. We worked on arms which was hard but not nearly as hard as legs. I am so stinkin sore. I just might become addicted to ibuprofin. Tomorrow we are working on legs again so that should be interesting because I can barely stand up.

This month Ryan decided to join in the mustache march ritual(thanks a lot Topher). He had a lot of fun with it, doing differant styles, etc. It was fun while it lasted but I am sure glad its over. Ah, he is handsome no matter what. Love ya baby!

Day 1

2009-03-30T23:02:00.002-06:00

So I was a total basket case all day long. I was so nervous and just was needed a lot of pep talks. I hate the unknown. So I got to boot camp a little early because I knew that I needed to sign some papers,etc. I walk up to the door and... it was locked no one was there. Ahh! It took all of my courage to come this far. So I went and sat in my car and thought well maybe I'm not as fat as I think, I can maybe go to the rec center, or maybe I will buy an eliptical trainer. Then I look up and see the number to call if you have any questions. So I called and the lady said she would be there in five minutes. A few minutes later this super skinny cute girl unlocks the door and goes in. I am thinking um I need some encouraging words, so I called Ryan. He told me I could do and that I would be fine. OK, still feeling nervous I called my friend Natalie-no answer. So I think if I can just get my butt out of this car we can do it. I did it ya, I got out of my car. That ended up being the easy part. Today we worked on legs. We started out on the tredmill then we did lots of reps for leg workouts. Ouchie!! I am not in shape at all. Who knew that kneeling down and then standing up again 15 times would be so hard. That was the hardest thing I did today. Oh and I forgot to add we had to do this all with a 30 pound backpack on. You only have to have the backpack on the first week so hopefully I won't die this week. My legs are super sore but not as sore as I thought they would be, nothing a little lortab won't fix...j/k...maybe. This will be one of the hardest physical things I have ever done but I can do it.!! Thanks for the encouragement it helped alot!!

Okay here we go.....

2009-03-29T23:48:00.002-06:00

So Ryan and I are having our 10 year wedding anniversary this year!!! I can't believe it TEN YEARS!! So we have decided to go on a cruise. I am super excited but also in much need of losing some weight before we go. I have contemplated several methods and I have decided on this...boot camp for U -www.boot-camp4u.com. I am so super nervous because it is totally going to kick my trash. I am so out of shape. I have heard it is the hardest thing but I know that I can do it. I am going to document daily. I need some help and some encouraging words from all of you. I want to look super sexy for the cruise. My goal is to lose 20lbs before the cruise which is in 6 weeks. Hopefully it can be more. We will see....

Update on Daxtonius

2009-03-25T22:09:00.007-06:00

When Daxton was in the hospital Ryan gave him a warrior name...Daxtonius Parkerius!! Doesn't that sound manly? Well my little man is doing awesome. He has gained one whole pound!! Yeh for Daxton. He is almost sitting up all by him self, he sits up for a couple of seconds without me holding him up. He is definatly progressing in that area. His throwing up is at a minimun unless I am in a hurry to get somewhere and then it is completly acceptible for his little body to get rid of every ounce of food that is in his stomach. It is so much fun(sarcasm). Last week we had an appointment for Daxton to get his button put in. For the last 2 months he has had a tube coming out of his stomach now he has a little button. It was a simple procedure but it was super sad. His stomach hurt for several days following the button placement.

I had someone ask me if Daxton is really doing as well as I say he is. Yes!! He will forever be on medicine for his heart. We are dealing with developemental delays. But all things in perspective he is doing amazing. He is here with us. I find that every day, every smile, every giggle, every snuggle is another miracle. For where we were six months ago to now, yes my Daxtonius is doing Awesome!!

My sister flew in from Italy for two weeks to be with my Grandma. We had a lot of fun while we were her. I got to meet my new neice. It was so fun to see her as a mommy. While she was her we got together with the family and built paper rockets and launched them off in the church parking lot. The kids loved it. I only had a blanket for Daxton and it was getting cold so we resulted in putting him in this bunny suit to keep him warm. It was pretty hilarious. He reminded me of "Christmas Story" Ryan didn't find it amusing at all, oh well!

So all in all we are doing well. My Grandma is home from the hospital. We are enjoying every moment that she is allowed to stay with us. This has been a very hard couple of weeks and will continue to be a rough road for me and my family. But I do know that we will be carried through these days with the love of my Savior.

Lets Party!!!

2009-03-16T21:37:00.006-06:00

There is a benefit concert for a beautiful musician Paul Cardall. Paul is currently waiting on the heart transplant list. I don't know if you have listened to any of Pauls music but it is so beautiful and peaceful. I just purchased 3 of his cd's and I love them. They definatly bring the spirit into our home.

The concert is April 6th. Peter Brienholt, Kurt Bestor and Ryan Shupp and the RubberBand will be playing. After high school my friends and I were Peter Brienholt groupies. We had so much fun going to all of his concerts. It was awesome. So lets get together a gynormous girls(and boys-i guess) night out and go have fun and do some good, all in one night!

You can go to http://www.livingforeden.com/ for more info. Eden is his daugther you can also check out his blog I have a link on my sidebar to it. If your interested in purchasing any cd's you can buy them on his blog or go to Amazon, that is where I got mine.

The best person I know

2009-03-10T09:52:00.002-06:00

My grandmother, Betty Jo, went in to the hospital last week because of pneumonia, after some tests we now know that she has extensive lung and bone cancer. She has never smoked a day in her life. This has been a devestating blow to our family. I can truly say with no reservation that she is the best person I know. I have never, not once, heard her say a bad thing about anyone. She is always trying to find the best in everyone. She is a very talented musician. She plays the piano beautifully and has passed that gift on to me and the rest of her grandchildren. She has the most infectious laugh, she loves to giggle. Her and my grandpa have the kind of love and relationship that most only dream of. I love her and we will fight in this battle together, whatever the outcome.

Refreshed....

2009-03-06T09:19:00.002-07:00

Nothing like a few days of personal torment to get you focused on the important things in life and make your relationships stronger. Maybe that is why we are given the challenges we are. Thank you everyone for your concern. It does feel good to vent and let emotions out there. I am normally not one to ask "Why?" Because honestly it doesn't change anything we are still left to deal with the same situation. So I will let that "why" go in the void and have faith that in the next life maybe we can have answers. I know that my Savior suffered for all of us and never asked "why". He suffered because he loves us, all of us!

On another note I have recently been following the blog of Paul Cardell, he was born with the same condition as Dax, he has had multiple surgerys and is now 35 years old and awaiting a heart transplant. He has a wife and a beautiful little girl. He is a amazingly gifted musician and has numerous CD's that are so peaceful and inviting. This past week the Deseret News did a article about him and his wait, I found it very insightful. It is amazing to read others transplant journey it is like reading my thoughts and emotions. What an amazing gift and sacrifice. Check out the article it is very insightful. http://www.deseretnews.com/article/1,5143,705288890,00.html
You can also follow his blog and help pray for his new heart.http://www.mytricuspidatresia.blogspot.com/

Why?

2009-03-04T23:53:00.002-07:00

Why do we have to suffer so much because of other peoples choices? All my life I have had to suffer the consequences of other peoples actions. And I am tired maybe if I start deliberately making bad choices then I can suffer my own consequences, I wonder if that hurts less or worse?
Don't ask I am just venting......

We love you Gracie!!

2009-03-03T12:47:00.003-07:00

Yesterday was a very sobering day for many. We are mourning with the Gledhill family as they have said goodbye to their sweet eternal angel Gracie. Gracie most definatly had a mission in this life. She has touched countless lives with her fight and her beautiful grace. I had a friend call me yesterday telling me how much Grace and her family have inspired her for the better. She wants for her and her family to be better, to be an eternal family. To Michelle, Tom and your sweet little ones, we are praying for you, that the comfort and beauty of the Savior will rest upon you now and in the weeks and months to come. You have touched our lives, you have stayed strong in the fight and have taught us to be better people. Gracie will never be forgotten!!

This quote has helped me and given me some insight into the passing of little ones.

“The Lord takes many away, even in infancy, that they may escape the envy of man, and the sorrows and evils of this present world; they were too pure, too lovely, to live on earth; therefore, if rightly considered, instead of mourning we have reason to rejoice as they are delivered from evil, and we shall soon have them again.” -Joseph Smith

My Madylin Jae is turning 6!!!!

2009-02-26T22:47:00.005-07:00

Happy Birthday my georgous 6 year old!! We love you! You definatly keep us on our toes. I am pretty sure if you look in the dictionary for the word drama queen your name would be the first in line. You are the best big sister! We hope that you have a wonderful birthday and hope that you will relax and enjoy every minute. We love you!!

Two Gracies....

2009-02-24T08:32:00.002-07:00

There are prayers needed for another Grace, she too has HLHS(left side of heart missing). She had her second repair surgery a month ago and is still in the picu struggling. Could you please add her to your prayers. Grace was Daxtons neighbor for a while in the picu and she was his neighbor the day he got his Heart. They have a special bond. Thank you and please keep praying for Gracie-she has been relisted for a Heart. I know both of these families could use all the prayers, positive vibes, etc. that we can give them.

Lots of Prayers for Gracie

2009-02-22T20:02:00.003-07:00

Gracies surgery did not go as planned and they think her body is rejecting her new heart. Please send so many prayers their way, this family has been through the refiners fire. Keep praying for more miracles.

A new heart for Gracie!!

2009-02-22T12:17:00.002-07:00

We are so thrilled and happy for the Gledhill family. Little miss Gracie is in surgery right now recieving her very special gift of a new heart. We are praying that everything goes absolutly flawless. Please send lots of prayers there way. This has brought back all the memories of our little Daxton. What a wonderful, amazing, heartbreaking, emotional day. Include in your prayers the family that has lost a sweet child. I truly believe that there gift is the most self sacrificing gift, they are angels and have given so many people new life through their loss. Thank you for saying "yes". This is another reminder of how important it is to be a donor.

Lots of Pictures....

2009-02-19T23:19:00.008-07:00

Beauty and the Beast!! Mady has had so much fun being in the play. She is a towns girl and a sugar cube. She was born to be in the dramatics. It has been a lot of fun. This year I got suckered into being a backstage helper, that has also been a lot of fun, but super crazy. We have had a lot of people come and see the play, Nurse Mary O, Nurse Peggy, Emily and Michelle, our amazing transplant cordinators. It has been so fun to see people we love away from the hospital. This has really been a fun play, this weekend is the last of the shows. We run Friday, a Matinee on Saturday and Saturday night. If anyone wants to come its at Woods Cross High School. It is very entertaining and very well put together production.

Grandma Helen and Grandpa Warren from Arkansas are here visiting. The girls love when they come, they love swimming at the hotel and getting to have sleepovers.

My sweet little man, doesn't he just melt your heart...

My little Ellie has been so obsessed lately with having her hair done pretty. It is so cute, she has never liked her hair done so it is quite the change for us. She is so spunky and full of personality you never know what your gonna get. Love her!!

Hi All!!

2009-02-15T12:49:00.003-07:00

We are home! After some begging and pleading and pulling a few strings we got to leave the hospital Friday around 5pm. I was begging and pleading because they wanted to make us stay longer because Daxton had thrown up twice in the morning. They had tested his blood sugar and it was really low-35. So they gave him an ounce of orange juice tested again, still low. Gave him another ounce of orange juice tested again and it was better. Then half an hour later he threw up all of his meds, then we regave the meds and he threw up again. I truly believe it was the orange juice. He had never had orange juice before and he is already on two medications to help his acid in his stomace. Anyway all that was being done was giving him pedialyte in his gtube and I told them that I could most definatly take care of that at home. So they let us go. Even though my house is in total disaray I am so glad to be home. Daxton is too, when I put him in his car seat he gave me this look of relief, poor little man. So we are doing better. No through up all day yesterday and today. He looks so much better and is smiling again.

On a differant note we have a heart friend that is starting their journey towards Heart Transplant. They are now at Primarys where they are going to have to stay until she recieves a new heart. Every prayer is needed for this little angel, her name is Gracie and you can visit her blog http://thegledhillfamily.blogspot.com/ They are starting a journey full of ups and downs, but in the process will see the Lords hand in all his wonder. Send them your love and faith. Thank you!

We're Back!!

2009-02-11T19:03:00.002-07:00

Oh ya baby! Yesterday we went to the Doctor..Results; double ear infections and Influenza A. After the doctor Daxtons cough was getting worse and he wasn't keeping anything down, so this morning I talked to the Transplant team and they said come on up to the hospital. So that is where we are right now. We got here about 11:30 am, it is now 7 pm. We are still in the ER waiting for a room to become availabe upstairs. We will be staying overnight and maybe a few days. We will see. I am having super anxiety, everyone around us has RSV. I do not want him to get that also. Please send my little man some prayers. Thank you so much