Happy!

We are enjoying life without the musical. Closing night was last Tuesday night. We had a lot of fun, but we are so glad that it is over. We love getting to bed at a decent hour, I love not having to curl hair for 4 hours out of my day, and I love being able to cook dinner and not eating take out.

Daxton is a walking champion! It is one of the most joyous things I have ever witnessed. I love when he comes waddling around a corner and has the biggest smile on his face. I love it. He is now mostly walking and only results to scooting when absolutely necessary. It is so fun to watch.

My little brother Zach and his family rented a house in Long Beach, California so we decided to pick up and go to Disneyland. We are so excited! We leave this weekend. I absolutely love Disneyland! The first time we took Mady when she was 2 1/2 years old and I was pregnant with Elizabeth. Ryan likes to make fun of me because when we were walking in the entrance there was Disney music playing and Mady was so excited, I was excited and I started to cry. It was pretty funny but wonderful. Hopefully I will be able to keep my emotions in check. We are pretty excited!

"For our Good"

My heart is aching tonight for my dear dear friends. They had to say goodbye to their 4 day old baby yesterday. This has ripped at my heart. I can't seem to stop crying. I just want to hold my babies and never let them go. I hate to ask the question "why" and I won't, but trying to find comfort and understanding I was searching and found these quotes that speak truth to my soul.

"An understanding of Christ’s plan of redemption helps put it all into perspective. In our preexistent state our Father in Heaven presented His plan for mortality, which Alma described as the “plan of happiness” (Alma 42:8). I believe we all understood that by coming to earth, we would be exposed to all of the experiences of earth life, including the not-so-pleasant trials of pain, suffering, hopelessness, sin, and death. There would be opposition and adversity. And if that was all we knew about the plan, I doubt if any of us would have embraced it, rejoicing, “That’s what I have always wanted—pain, suffering, hopelessness, sin, and death.” But it all came into focus, and it became acceptable, even desirable, when an Elder Brother stepped forward and offered that He would go down and make it all right. Out of pain and suffering He would bring peace. Out of hopelessness He would bring hope. Out of transgression He would bring repentance and forgiveness. Out of death He would bring the resurrection of lives. And with that explanation and most generous offer, each and every one of us concluded, “I can do that. That is a risk worth taking.” And so we chose."

After all that I have experienced with Daxton and being a witness to many other heart friends journeys, experiencing the grief of losing a beloved Grandmother and Uncle and many more challenges that I have faced in my life, it does give me great comfort to know that there is a plan for me and all of us. We knew what we would face and we knew that it would be worth it. The sweet far outweighs the bitter. I don't know why my son was spared and others are not. All I know is that there are no words to express my gratitude that I am able to raise him here on this earth and that I am able to see his wonderful milestones. There is a plan and it is for our Good.

Please keep my friends in your prayers.

The rest of this article is very beautiful and worth the few minutes it take to read.
LDS.org - Liahona Article - For Thy Good

Daxton Walking

This is actually Ryan. Wanting to post these vids I took of the Daxton walking. He's doing awesome!
Enjoy.....

And the Women were sobbin...........

We are heavily involved with Woods Cross High Schools production of Seven Brides for Seven Brothers. My mother-in-law is the Director, my mom is the Technical Director and choreographer, both Mady and Ellie are in the play and I am the hair dresser for the show and will be running lights for the show.

This is one of my most favorite musicals so it has been a lot of fun. The girls just love it and are singing and dancing all day long.

The show runs from Jan 28-Feb 16th with matinees on Feb 6th and 13th. The show starts at 7pm and runs about 2 hours. Ticket prices are $5-$8. You can call the ticket office for tickets at 801-402-4611.

I promise you will not leave disappointed. The girls would love to see you there.

Goodbye ritual

My sweet little Elizabeth has a ritual now that must be done in accordance when saying goodbye or we have a catastrophic meltdown. This is how it plays out.

Me-"Mommy has to run to the store I will be right back"
Ellie-"No, don't leave me"
Me-"I will be right back and if you don't cry I will bring you back a treat"
Ellie-"I want to come"
Me-"I will be right back"
(this is where the sobbing begins-when I say sobbing I mean Ellie sobbing)
Ellie"Mom(saying this while crying) I love you, don't leave me, hold me, Happy Holidays."
Me-"I love you too, I will see you in a minute"
Ellie-(still sobbing)"love you, Happy Holidays"
Me-"Happy Holidays"
Ellie-(starting to panic cry)"Mom, Mom, I love you Happy Holidays"
Me-(she is now grasping onto me)"Sweetie go get Daddy I will be right back, I love you"
Ellie-(still crying) "I love you, I want to come"
Daddy finally comes and takes her, I actually walk out the door and half way to my car.
Ellie-(running while sobbing) "Mom, I love you, Happy Holidays"
Me-"Ellie I love you too, Happy Holidays, go back inside"
Ellie-(watching mom drive away yells one more) "Happy Holidays"

It is very adorable, yet annoying. This goes on even if I am just going to get the mail. I am now starting to sneak out to avoid long drawn out over dramatized productions. This morning she put the piano bench in front of the door so Mady could not leave for school. She cracks me up. Love this girl, she defiantly makes my life exciting.

Public Display

Today I went to lunch with Ellie and Daxton to one of my favorite sandwich shops. It was time to feed Daxton and as usual would not let a significant amount of food pass his cute little lips. So I pulled out the tube and began feeding him. I have never fed him through his button in a public restaurant before and was concerned by the onlookers. There was one lady who would not stop staring every time I looked over she was looking at us. It made me very uncomfortable. It was one of those moments when you feel like everyone is staring at you but you are probably just being paranoid. I was getting so frustrated because all Daxton wanted to do was stand up and make a mess and to add to the joys Ellie decided today would be a good day to be as loud as possible every second of the day. I just felt overwhelmed. It was very unsettling.

So my question to all you tube feeding Mommy's, what do you do when you feed your kids in public? What is the "etiquette" for such feedings? And also I am wondering if you a "normal" person who has not seen a tube feeding before would it gross you out to see it in public and if it does what could we do to not gross you out?

Daxtons last cardiology appointment was Thursday and he had gained a little bit of weight. We met with the nutritionist again and we set some different goals. I was hoping that we could pull him off of tube feeds but it is not looking like that will be in the cards for awhile. They did start him on a new medicine that helps make him have a stronger appetite. Hopefully this will help.

New Years Confessions

Ok so last year sometime I blogged about my goal to run a half-marathon. I started to train I really did. I got up to about 4 miles and I thought to myself "what am I doing?" "I don't want to run 13ish miles" I realized how silly it was when I drove from my parents house to my bank then up to my Uncles house then back home and it was barely 3 miles. I thought that is pure insanity. So I stopped. I admire those that can get up at the bottom crack of dawn and run but I am not that person. I love love love my sleep. So that is my confession, Wow, I feel a whole lot better.

Having said all of that here is part 2 of my insanity quest.

My big brother has invited me to be part of the Wastach Back Relay Race. This race consists of 12 team members running from Logan to Park City. Does this sound a little bit suicidal to anyone else. I really did try to talk myself out of it the other day but my brother would have none of it. So the training begins. Does this sound fun? No. Will it be fun? Probably. But I probably won't admit that until the end. So wish me luck I will most defiantly need it. And I will not not not quit this, no matter if it kills me. And yes saying that sends shivers down my spine and gives me an instant stomach ache, but I will prevail!!